#194 - Dominic Sessa

Folks, we have an incredible episode with my boy Dominic Cessar, a star of Tony, which is out this Friday nation wide, go see it, and also go see tires in the comfort of your own home. It's on Netflix. It came out last week so proud of the season, so, so funny. Shane McKeever, Steve Gurman, we have Foley, so many friends of the podcast, Dan Soder, my beautiful wife, Steph Tollev, so many people have done this podcast, some of the funniest people on Earth, we made a really, really, really great season of television. I can't wait for you to see it. Please check it out. Check out Tony, and then of course, Uncle Stov comes out September 8th in a couple weeks here. So, it's busy here at Stovvy Baby Enterprises, and we hope you will like all this stuff. We worked really, really hard on to put out this year, and for right now, enjoy the podcast with my pal and yours, Dominic Cessa. Opa, welcome everybody to Stovvy's World, 904-800-STOP, all the Stovvy's World hotline presented by Visible will solve all your problems, and today I'm very happy. I don't know if you can tell, it's a bit of a themed episode. We have my boy Dominic Cessa on the couch, Dom, what's up, baby? It's not exactly like our regular conversation. I want to speak to the people. No, we actually cannot have our regular conversations on camera. We will be toning it down just a little bit, folks, but we have here the two, I think arguably the two most important parts of Tony, the movie. We are doing a podcast, Tony, in theaters in New York at LA right now, and I think next week look at what, when this comes out, what is that right? It is, when it comes out, we got it, don't worry, guys. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You've been a fucking doing movies. You don't know that sometimes we were poor things ahead of time, you dumb ass. We're not live going on YouTube right now. You've been doing too much press, your brain is fried and you're like, huh, but it's not even out yet. Yeah. It is crazy if the movie hasn't even come out. It is nuts, dude. The, honestly, I will, I'll suck us off a little bit to start. The movie is awesome. And I know you're not supposed to say that when you're in the movie, you're supposed to be like, oh, it was fucking good as hell, but it rocks, guys, you're going to like it. I saw it with my mom, dude, did I told you that? My mom watched it. Yes. She went to the premiere. Did you read my mom? Yeah, yeah. Great lady. Great vibes, obviously. I need to meet your mom, man. Dude, absolutely. We should, yeah. We should set up mom plate days. I legit think they would get along. I got your mom's vibe. I was like, whoa. Yes. She's awesome. Yes. Your sister was there. It's a family affair. Yeah, it was awesome. No, we had a lot of fun making the movie. The movie was. Yeah. That's a thing. You can see that. It is, it is the only time. Like, I feel like, look, obviously, I don't know shit about. I've just started acting. You're a, you're a little baby who's only done a couple of movies. But we don't really have, we don't have like the experience for this shit. But I feel like every time I see somebody promote a movie, they're like, we're just the, we were all friends. Right. And it was so fun. And you know half the time they hated each other. I know. They can't even be in the same room. Yeah, barely talk to you. Barely. But we are a movie at a problem because we would sometimes play Mario Kart too long when we were supposed to go back and shoot. We were late to set. We were late to set because we were across the street in a different house hanging out. So when did you got there when we were all like in the restaurant? Exactly. So we were, we were basically staying in a, we all shared a green room with the house across the street. Yes. And Reese, my good friend Reese, that had to Reese, who was with us for the entirety of. Yeah. I know. And you will, Reese gives a star turn, folks. Yeah. You'll see him. Look at, when you watch the movie, look out for the man with the best hair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's Reese. That's the only clue we're going to give you. Look at it. You're like, why the fuck does hair look like that? That's Reese. Yeah. Dead giveaway. Yeah. But he's awesome. He's the man. Shocking. And he, yeah. He got, he, he, you sent him on a, on a very important mission to get a TV incredibly important mission. And that was the day we were shooting the clan bacon. It was hot as fuck for that. It really boosted the morale. It was. When we got there, I was like, it was hot as fuck. Yeah. It was like the hottest day. There's no sun. It was my first day shooting. Yeah. We hadn't done any of the kitchen stuff yet. And I was like, damn, this, everybody was kind of pissed it felt like. What was the, did they give you like any, because you were obviously making all these lobster rolls. Yeah. You have any sort of instruction. I had, I had a two, I had one day of training. Yeah. How was that? With our food coordinator. She was awesome. Yeah. She was the best. And she would, she would also make us, I ate so much lobster. And then sometimes you would just be like, hey, can you make me some more lobster for lunch? We could sneak over to her. Yeah. We always getting buttered lobster every day for lunch. Yeah. They were hooking it up. Yeah. They really were. It was the, I will say, be like, being fat as hell in one of my first big movies being a four game movie. I'm so spoiled. Because now I just did a movie where it's like about country music, I'm like, this fucking sucks. Oh really? Well, no, the movie's awesome. But I was like, where the lobster? Yeah. Where's the oysters? There's no all you can eat. I mean, look, it was cool. I got to meet some fucking country music stars, but I would. No disrespect to them, but yeah, I mean, people asked me a lot, like, what was the best eating I did? Like in Cape Cod. Yeah. And I would say on set. Totally. Just like, I mean, we had fresh lobster, fresh oysters, fresh fish, every totally fucking day, it was amazing. And everyone was so like, you can't have shitty food on a board day movie. Yeah. Yeah. If our food looked like shit, that would have been like, we could have been bad in that. It was the one thing we'd be eating. Yeah. We could have blown it, but like if the food looks like shit, like don't do the movie. So they were, they really cared about that. And we were. We spent more money on the food. Probably. Dude, I've said this a hundred times. They definitely spent more money on lobster. I consumed than what they paid. It's not even close. I was straight up. Remember how many lobsters I was taking down? I mean, what does a lobster go for it? Like a pound of lobster? Yeah. Elders, do a little fucking, do a little market research. Yeah. Come on, man. Yeah. Let's actually do so fast. We were in the kitchen for like two weeks. We were shooting in there. Yeah. Yeah. Two weeks. Okay. Two weeks. So 10 days. 10 days total. Let's say I average six lobsters a day. Yeah. Which actually is low. Yeah. That's a, that's a generous average. That's really concerned. That's insanely conservative. We're, we're looking at a retail in the range of 14 to 25 per pound at local, local fish market. So let's, how much, how much is a, what, one lobster is what, half a pound, do you say? A big ass lobster? I mean, maybe we should do it by the lobster roll. Right. Right. Ooh, great point. What is a market price lobster roll go for all this? And quick. Hurry up. This is a lot. This is a lot. This is a lot. Dude, right? On the five to 40. Wow. Okay. So let's say I had eight lobsters rolls a day, which feels right. Yeah. Which honestly legitimately does not, because also, it was also funny because every time between takes are like, all right, reset. And I was like, uh, we're going to need to have 24 or more. Yeah. I ate the lobster roll I just made. So let's say they're 30 bucks. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. $240 a day. A $240 date. That's honestly. Yeah. Yeah. And that's so conservative. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I had to sleep at the foot of match bed. They didn't help me up. It was funny though, because I was like, did you get to have some time? Like, cause we shot actually in P town, Cape Cod. Did you get any time to like hit the beach? Do any of that shit? Did you get any toys? A little bit. Yeah. Well, the first night that me, Leo and Amelia were there, we're all staying in the same hotel. Oh, that's sick. And Leo, you know, he's just, he's like a, he's a, he's a social butterfly. He's the man. Yeah. He's a people person. friends just walking down the street with the first two hours with like all of these restaurant owners and bar owners. Yeah. And he was like taking us out the first night. And then Matt joined us. And we kind of, yeah, I guess showcase ourselves to the town. Oh, because people probably pumped you're there. They were so happy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And we were meeting them and they were excited. They were so stoked about the movie. Yeah. Dude, we got a bomb. It was awesome to like wrap and then just run into the ocean. Yeah. It was super hot. I mean, we were there and you and what sucked is we all wrapped. And then you had one day where it was just you, right? Dude, I was so like, I had so many days before you got there, too, where I was just like, I'm all by myself. Yeah, because this movie, it's you. I mean, you're in every part of the movie. And so there must have been times where they're just shooting your face close as fuck for a whole day with nobody around. Matt talking to me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's not like, thank God we had Matt. He truly is like, I don't know. He was just, he was just with us all the time. 100% kept the morale going. Dude. He's fun. He's, he's like, the way he directs is so sick. Cause it's like, uh, he just explains everything so well. And he just, every note he gives you, he directly, it's for a reason that he explains immediately. Yeah. Like you know exactly what, what you're trying to achieve. Right. And there's no like guessing. I don't know. I don't know. - I don't know if you've ever worked with, I mean, I haven't worked with that many motherfuckers, but it's like, I do feel like some directors, kind of, they love being like, the little king of their deal. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And just like, yeah, they want to sound like they have some sort of like breakthrough idea. - Right. - And it holds everything up because they're trying to like, be smart. - Yes, yes, totally. - But with Matt, like, even if he doesn't know you that well or like, you're just there for the day. - Totally. - He, you feel like he's your friend. - Oh, I understand. - You don't feel nervous. - I don't know. I don't know how it's like. - I never felt nervous like acting in front of him. - Totally, he and great. And he, the best note he gave was like, 'cause he asked you to do so much dumb bullshit. Like, that feels embarrassing. You know what I mean? Like, in the moment, right, remember that thing where I just had to roast you? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I just bet you. And I was like, I don't know. I would, honestly, do know. I was like, I was hoping you were gonna be a piece of shit. I was like, this little asshole, this guy gets, the first movie he makes is awesome. He's with geometry being the man. What the fuck? At our preps school, fuck this kid. And then he's handsome, he gets there. And then I met him, I was like, fuck, he's awesome. I don't wanna make fun of him. And then immediately, Matt's like, all right, no script. Go ahead and just roast dumb for 20 minutes. Silent. Silent, nobody's allowed to laugh 'cause it's a movie. It doesn't make sense if you hear the crew laughing. It's all I got was Matt snickering with his little iPad. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - He would lay on, all those kitchen scenes for everybody listening. Matt was literally laying on the ground, hiding under a steel. Like, in every scene that we're in the kitchen, Matt is like laying Tommy, give himself Tommy time, looking at his iPad and directing us. And all I had, all I got was Matt occasionally. If I had a really good one, he would be like, (laughs) - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - But because before that, he was like, he was like, look, this is gonna feel dumb as hell, but I will never make you look, I will do my best to make you look like a genius. I'm never gonna hang you out to dry. - Then he did. - And he never did, dude, who he never did. - He's like, I feel like he casts people and that he knows already going into it, like he doesn't really have to work too hard. - Yeah, get what he needs out of them, you know? - Yeah, and I wonder if it's because like, all that Nirvana, the band, the show shit. He basically created, he basically would cast insane people off the street to make the show. And he would just, I bet he'd that motherfucker's like, how did you even meet him in the first place? - We just met because he was like, there was, he was working on a different project. Like, I liked, I was a fan of his, I guess he was a fan of mine. And we just met about something like a movie that I don't know if it's still in development or if like whatever. And it sounded cool. And more than that, I was like, I really liked this. Like, I was like, this guy's awesome. And I had seen, I had, being elders, when we lived, I moved to, we moved in together in a story like 12 years ago at this point. And that was the height of vice, right? And look, this is our generational difference. When I was your age, it was like, the millennial vice, that was the coolest, we're like, dude, vice is awesome. It's not huge like for old people. Sometimes the guys that do news, they smoke weed. You know, and I remember being like, whoa, dude. And then vice, you could tell when the fucking channel was failing 'cause then every other show was like, what happened to vice? - Dude, I don't exactly, actually, isn't Matt literally making a movie about vice right now? - Yeah. - I think, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Fuck, fuck him, we're plugging his next project. Fuck that movie, Tony. - Yeah, yeah. - That's the only one. We're not in Matt's next movie. So don't watch that one. Watch only the ones we're in. But it was like, that channel started falling apart 'cause every other show was just green screen or about smoking weed. - It was like smoking weed at the library. Like smoking weed. And smoking weed and going shopping with two chains. It's like, all right, guys. This isn't fucking, yeah, yeah. This isn't real entertainment. I guess I remember like the sort of, yeah, the end of that when it was all, all of the shit was on YouTube. - Totally. - And it was, yeah, it was exactly that sort of thing. - And look, the best, I loved Action Brons. The fuck that's delicious was so awesome. And like literally, I feel like Action Bronson does everything he's done. I'm like, fuck dude, that's what I wanted to do. But he just got to it seven years earlier. And he's just me, but cooler. Like musician is so much cooler than comedian. Comedian's pathetic. Rapper with the fucking head moves. - Yeah, I always think about that. Like being a musician, like being a rock star, I don't know, like, I mean, coolest shit in the world. - I know. Like making, even acting. - Like acting is fun. - But it's embarrassing. - Like, let's see it or can't talk. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like, we literally, different people write stuff. - Yeah. - And we're like, all right, I gotta say these words. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I wrote, good. - I can pretend to be cool. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, exactly. - Your job is to pretend to be the coolest guy. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That's like, that's like a challenge. - The job is so like, and then you match the best director, but most of the time, it's like, did I do a good job, daddy? - You want me to do it again, sir? - Yeah. - It's literally demeaning as well. - You're afraid, yeah. - Yeah, you want to be afraid to ask for to try it again. - Totally, yeah, yeah, exactly. You don't want to ask for anything. - But, yeah. - Yeah, why not just cast a real life cool person? - Totally. - To hire this person whose job it is to pretend to be cool. - 'Cause they would be like, they would be, oh, fuck, I think I cut myself on the fucking, this is a real life, folks. I barely stopped before it broke. Oh, yeah, a little blood here. - We don't have first day in the office. - You have first day fucking idiot, no thanks to you. You're supposed to be managing everything. God forbid you fucking, you don't even know I bought one dumb ass. - It's go we have one, man. (laughing) - Fuck, what were we talking about before I cut myself? - No knife. - It was something I had a point to make too, fuck. Eldis, did you were you paying attention producer of the podcast? - I don't know. - No, no, guess. Yeah, just give us something to go out. Now, you get the coolest guy for a day. - Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. - You actually helped me, no thanks to yourself, but because of an actual cool person, they would be like, okay, they would show up the first day, and they would have, maybe they would have a good time, and then the next day they'd be like, all right, see you at 7 a.m., and you'd be like, no. And then eat smoked cigarettes, do drugs, and like, (laughing) that's why you have to get asked, you can't get asked for cool people. Except sometimes, I mean, the saddest is doing a good job about it, the street casting, Jen Vendetti, who's cast all their stuff, they do an awesome job, but you gotta have a mix. - Being a rock star though, it's like, oh my god. - It seems so awesome. - Do you have any musical talent whatsoever? - No, no. - But I feel like, today you can just kind of pretend. - Totally. (laughing) - Should I start a, right now of them? - That would be awesome. That would be, no, you can't now 'cause you're already an actor. - Yeah. - I have to wait for this to start like, going sour. - No, no, 'cause that's pathetic. - When a failed actor is like, check out my band. - Yeah. - Oh, no. - It's like, yeah, it's like, check out the fucking music, like, and they all, I mean, I mean, yeah, when they're like, don't ask me about movies, ask me about my band, it's like, all right, man. - Right. - All right, I remember Bruce Willis had a band for a while. - Nobody cares about your fucking band. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - We don't wanna see you play harmonica, Bruce. - Yeah. - We wanna see you in public. - Shoot some guys and throw them off a roof. - Yeah, dude, sorry, you missed your mark, but you could have, honestly, if it wasn't for acting, man, you could have been an industry plant for sure. - What does that mean? - It just means they pick, somebody picks someone and makes them a star. - Like what's somebody like, who, like a, - Like, they see like, like an executive, like, like, it doesn't happen so much anymore. I mean, I guess it still happens. Now they have to, like, wait, like, what would they, what would they choose you based on? They'll just be in a piece of ass. - Yeah. - So they would see you, they would put you in a leather jacket and sunglasses and they'd be, like, just lip sync. They'd give you a guitar and be like, don't worry, the guy backstage is actually playing it, you know what I mean? Or they'd let you, like, have the, just the easiest drumming of all, they'd figure something out. - Right, right, right. - You know, you could have been plucked. If they hadn't gotten you for, for holdovers, they could have gotten you for, for, for, for being a, a fake musician. - But, dude, I know, I would always be like, damn, dude, being a fucking singer would be so sick. - Yeah. - Like a guitar or a wrapping. - Yeah. - It's just like, yeah. (laughing) - And that's a real problem. - Of being like a pro athlete. - Oh, dude, that's, yeah. - That's peak. - That's the, but that's the opposite of, like, you basically put every awesome moment of your life into, like, 10 years. - Right. - You know, 'cause, like, 2022 to, like, 34 as a pro athlete is the best shit in the world. - Yeah, I can do this for a while. - Exactly, yeah, yeah. - You could do this for the rest of your fucking life, dude. - Right, right. - Yeah, have you ever thought, yeah, I mean, you're still, you're still in, like, young, fucking, angio-new territory, but. - I could, yeah. - Would you ever, what's the, do you ever want to be a body transformation guy, dude? You want to get, you want to get fat as shit for a role? - Yeah, I would. That would be fun. - Higher me is your consultant. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - If you, if you have to put on 40 pounds for a role, then I don't immediately get a phone call. This is my number, bro. - I have, I have Marvel paying, you know what I'm like. - Yeah, they cast you as like the blob. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - They're paying, they're paying you to take me out to fucking eat. (laughing) - I would be so good at that job. Honestly, if any studio out there wants me to fatten up a star, go to me, I'll do it cheap. And listen, how about we put, put me in the movie, I'll do it for real. How about that? (laughing) Fuck, yeah, exactly. - High calories, low quantity. - High calories, yeah. I wake you up in the middle of the night. Just put a milkshake in your mouth. I just fucking, I put a beer ball in your mouth. And I'm like, I'm just putting cookies in the cream. - You just gotta, you just gotta button with tubes. (laughing) - And yeah, in the movie, Ben Dara's wakes you up with fucking water, I just wake up with pudding. I'm like, "Eat your way through a pal!" Each morning starts with 2,000 calories of tapioca pudding. (laughing) - Chocolate. - Yeah, pure chocolate. I do think it would be hard to get you to gain weight, though, because you fucking, you're like, your diet is very like, you eat fucking noodles, you eat candies. I would have to do liquid calories for you. - Yeah, you know. - Well, that consists of. - Honestly, yeah, milkshakes, sneak a little olive oil and you know, sneak a little olive oil in like a cocktail. (laughing) - Oh, you know what, getting fucked up would be the secret. - Yeah, drink a lot about it. - Drink a lot about it. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, yeah, that is true, that is true. - I'll figure it out, we can figure it out. What is like your treat, like, do you have like a specific meal? Do you have like a, when you really want to treat yourself, I know we've had some fried chicken together, that's a very decade, we've had some-- - No, I know what I'm like making for myself at times. - Tell me. - And it's like, if I friends over to try to make a meal, I'll cook a ribeye, like a thick-ass ribeye. - Hell, yes. - And mac and cheese as well. - I love that. - Joe off camera, it makes the same dish pretty well. - I love it. - The thing is Joe prefers velvita, cheese on the side. - Joe, you white trash. (laughing) - Our friend Joe dumps managers here. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah, I prefer the craft. - Oh, okay, so you're also white trash. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Just a different type of white trash. (laughing) - Yeah, craft, okay, yeah, this is you being fucking 23, where you're like, where your big meal is crap. You fucking put a ribeye with craft mac and cheese you fucking dumbass. (laughing) - It's amazing. - It's like, you're getting a $70 cut of meat and a $1.25. - It's exactly what it, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's like my whole food's receipt. It's like $2.99 for craft mac and cheese. $78 for a steak. (laughing) Honestly though, I am shitting on you. That does sound good. - Dude, when the steak juice seeps into the mac, mm-hmm. (laughing) The amount you love craft is good. This is good though, 'cause you're growing up. 'Cause I feel like even like two years ago, you would not have had a rip. You wouldn't have cooked your own ribeye. - No. - You know, you would have just had craft mac and cheese and like, you know, chicken tendings. - Chicken nuggets, yeah. - No, not even that. Handlers is a big step up for you. - Yeah, that's good, that's good. Next year you'll actually have some artisan. I like what you're saying. - You don't get rice going. - Rice is good. (laughing) (laughing) - It's rice peel off. - Yeah, all right, a little peel off. - I feel like that's like an upgrade from craft mac. - I think, or we get, listen, we don't gotta go away from mac and cheese dumb. We'll get artisan cheeses. We'll fuckin' mix a couple different types. In fact, in fact, actually, when I'm done with my shit, like when I'm done with my, 'cause the special comes out in September, which Matt directed. When I'm done doing press for that, we will make the most upgraded mac and cheese of your life, you know? And we also have to dabble in, like, I think we need to get some soul food mac and cheese of your life, too, you know? We gotta expand, this is how we're gonna expand your culinary horizons. Yeah, yeah. We start with, we're gonna have you sample four different types of mac and cheese. Okay, I'm liking this a lot. What about a potato with the ribeye? - See, like, I don't really-- - Not a starch. - I'm not been like a big potato. (laughing) I've just started to kind of like mash potatoes, but one time when I was little, I had mashed potatoes with, like, melted cheese on it. - Oh, okay. - And it made me puke. - Ah, so it's like-- - So I kind of, like, since then, I've had time. - I had the same shit with strawberry, that had strawberry, like, milk, you know? Like, strawberry, you who's? - Yeah, yeah. - As a child, I remember, it was like-- (laughing) - It was my Christmas party for third grade. - Yes. - And I was just like-- (laughing) - I was crushing it, dude. No other, all the other kids-- I think it was something where I got there late and all the chocolate milk was gone, and nobody wanted. You can have strawberry. If you have chocolate milk, you're not taking strawberry. - Yeah, yeah. - So, dude, I chugged like five little cartons of milk, and seven seconds later. And it was like, it was our Christmas party, and it was like-- (laughing) And they were, like, gifts thrown about. Like, everyone-- And I was just like-- (laughing) - And I was just-- - Pink eccocious vomiting all over. And I ruined, like, our third grade Christmas party. - Oh. - And ever since those days, like, to this day, seeing you-- And I love you, who's-- Or actually was strawberry next quick. Seeing strawberry next quick to this day makes me say-- - You who is really fucking-- - I love you. - I love you, who's-- - Elvis, were you in that-- Me and I also have no solutions to kindergarten. Were you in Miss-- - Actually, it was first grade. - Do you guys were in kindergarten together? - Yeah. (laughing) - Yeah, yeah. It's insane. (laughing) I've known Elvis 30-- I've known Elvis literally 10 years more than you've been alive. (laughing) - Whoa. (laughing) - That's fucking awesome, man. - Yeah, we're old, we're washed. - Yeah, sure. - Were you in Miss-- - This goes in-- - First grade. - Yes, yes I was. - Do you remember that? That was the class. Maybe a little. - Okay. - I just remember I got bullied really bad there for a couple of years and it's not the good. - Oh, yeah, for what? - I like raised my middle finger in class accidentally. - Oh. - I do. - I remember that fucking game. - I remember that always my boogers on his shirt. - Yes, yes, yes. - I'm sure he's funny. - You want to talk about-- - You want to talk about white trash. - Oh, yeah, he'd look at a craft magazine. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. That kid has the same kid back in his case as you. - What was the school called? - It was called John Rura. - Elements, John Rura. - Yeah, yeah. Shout out to John Rura. And of course, everyone claims that he haunted the halls. - Yeah. - He was like a doctor or some shit and that's what we were told anyway. So, wait, they were trying to get you to snitch. - No, I raised my middle finger in class and he looked at me and I realized what I did. I was like, oh, and then he saw my distress. - Oh. - And he housed. And then he was like, I'm gonna tell. I got all these sick ass pencils for a couple of weeks and he made me give all of them. The best only I had to snitch up. - You let him fucking shake you down, dude. - That shook down. - And Eldis was literally a recent refugee from Albania. He came to America for a better life. - I was literally an East all at the time. - Yeah, he actually couldn't speak English at the time. So this piece of fucking white trash just found him. I was like, just was like, oh nice. You want a piece of the American dream pal? - Yeah. - Give me those transformers pencils. Those are mine now or you're I'm telling. - Wow. - You've heard of taxes. - Yeah. - Yeah, you got taxed big time. - I'm sure his life is terrible. - Oh, yeah. - I mean, I pray. - No, no, don't pray on it. I mean, everyone we went to school with it was like, so everyone's life is bad. Like, I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think from our first, I think literally just me, you and, are the people, or fuck, leap it out. Me, you and the mysterious and elusive big P. Our other friend, we've known forever. I think maybe it was only us that have good lives from our first grade class. It was, yeah, both of the more than 90s was not great. But, you know, we made, look, we made it out. We're podcasting now and that's what's important. Do you remember the first time you ever got in trouble? Did you get in trouble in school for anything? - Yeah, the first time I like really got in trouble. I'm trying to think like when I was like younger. When I was in high school. - Yeah, whatever, if you ever-- - Yeah, yeah, yeah. The one that I could think of is when I was in high school, my first year at boarding school, we were like, we were experimenting with drinking like over-the-counter coffee, you know? Like, like, like, robo-tripping? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, like drinking like a whole thing of robo-tripping and we like went on these fucking, like mall trips. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And there was a CVS at the mall and that was like our-- - Time to re-up. - Yeah, but we weren't even old enough to buy. We weren't even 18 yet. So we had to steal fucking robo-tripping from the CVS and-- - That's so funny. - And then like, I don't know, I think we-- You know, they do like random room searches. - Oh, yeah, of course. - And then in my friend's room, they found like eight bottles of fucking-- - Oh, my god, you know what I'm talking? - Yeah, I'm talking. (laughing) And we got fucked. - That's so funny. - My friends got like, I mean, a couple of kids got kicked out. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I survived them. - 'Cause I was well liked, I was well liked. - Right, right. - So I was able to kind of like, work it out. (laughing) - Do some politicking. - Dude, I had to politics so hard. - I bet the kid, 'cause usually the kid who holds onto it is also the kid that's probably been in trouble the most. - Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I'm sure you were actually like, I can't see you being a big troublemaker as a youth. Am I wrong about that? Were you like-- - No, I was served. - Like, yeah, I was pretty reserved. I feel like, I, I mean, no, I definitely got in like, a good amount of trouble. - Okay. - Like, I was not, I was well behaved in school, you know, but I felt like, because I was in boarding school. You're in this environment for like nine months. - Of course. - And then when I was home for summer, I would do-- - And you're what, when did you start doing that? You're 13, 14? - I was like 14, yeah. - That's fucking exciting. (laughing) - You must have been, what the fuck? I gotta go, you know. - Yeah, that's nuts. - That's a tough time to have a roommate. - Dude, we, - Yeah. - You got, those are prime things off yours. (laughing) - Another 14-year-old dude? - No, the school, the school I was at, we all had single. - Oh, that's huge. - Which was awesome. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay. - But you still couldn't, like, you had to, like if you wanted to hang out with a girl, you had to like, break the rules, of course. - Like that, like that was for me, like that was my version of like, being, - That's your impression. - Yeah, like being at, like hanging out with a girl without telling like my dorm fare. - Of course, of course. - Dude, did they just send you there 'cause were you like a little prick or were they just like, "We gotta get him out of the house?" - Well, I wanted to like, I don't know, like I wanted to go to a good college. Like I don't know, like I had this idea in my mind when I was really young that if I just like, did like the hardest things possible that I would be like, rich one day. - I kind of just like, walked around in life and like, I looked at my parents and I was like, I hated like how satisfied they were and just like how, like, you know, like they were just, I'd just like chill, like, I don't know, like. - That's so funny to, you know. - To be like, my parents are too content with life. - Yeah, yeah, like they're too happy. This is beyond. Everybody's around me, it's happy. - You're a little broody. - Yeah, yeah, shit, that's so funny. - Yeah, and I don't know, like I guess just like, from watching movies and shit or whatever it was, like, I like, I wanted to be like, I don't know, I wanted like crazy life and I just told myself, like if I like work really hard in school, go to like a good college, that's like somehow something will like lead to something will work out. - That's fascinating. I'm trying to think like when I, I never, yeah, I'm trying to think like, that's an interesting ambition to have is like as a little kid to be like, I have to do all, I guess I kind of did that too because my family, I had the immigrant shit, where it's like you have to do it. Like my parents were like, hey, we need you to fucking do well. We're fucked if you don't. - Yeah. - But it's interesting because like, you also, 'cause you grew up on the beat, right? You grew up in Jersey and-- - Yeah, I grew up in-- - On the ocean city. - Ocean city, Jersey. It's a bizarre place to grow up also. - Yeah, it's like there's not a lot of kids and-- - Why were you guys living there? Your parents like work there? They just come from-- - I mean, yeah, like, I guess, like both of my parents are from New Jersey. - Okay. - And like, my grandparents live there. - Gotcha, gotcha, that's what you do. - So fucking, there, yeah, I don't know. (laughing) - But ocean city is fucking crazy. - Yeah. - It is a tour, 'cause I know Ocean City, Maryland. - Dude, yeah, it's a tourist place for sure. - So boardwalks and shit like that? - Yeah, like most of my friends from high school, from Ocean City, like, aren't from Ocean City. They're from, like, Philly. - Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. - Yeah, gotcha, gotcha. - Yeah, yeah. - They have their families have like, beach houses. - I see, I see, but you lived there. So your friends, like, that was there, like, part time, like, beach house zone, and you actually just lived there the whole time. - Yeah, exactly. - That's holy-- - And maybe that was something too. Like, I was constantly comparing myself to these fucking rich kids, who's like, you know, their families have these giant houses and shit. - Was that kind of the vibe a little bit? Or was, like, your family was like, kind of like, like, on the line of it, of, like, you're hanging. You're in these circles, and you're going to boarding school, but like, it sounds like it was a little tougher for your family than the other people. - Well, I feel like, I guess, like, specifically in school, like, I didn't have a, like, I had to get a, like, scholarship, basically, financially, which is a little bit different than how it works in college, like, these schools don't have as much of, like, an allocation to give money, you know, so, like, it's a lot harder to kind of get that. - Did you have to, like, was it, because I also might-- - And I wasn't, like, and I wasn't, like, good at anything. - So, like, that was the problem, yeah. - That's so interesting, because I, it's so funny, because when I was in fifth grade, yeah, I grew up in Baltimore, like, I said, Baltimore, the 90s, and public schools were pretty bad there. - Yeah. - And so, I did apply to a lot of these, like, really exclusive, like, we didn't have boarding schools. We had, like, private schools that, at the time, we're talking, when I was 11, so we're talking over 20 years ago, 25 years ago, Jesus fucking Christ, that's-- - I'm having a lot-- - A lot of hallucinations. - That's a quarter of a century. - That sucks. Shut the fuck up. Don't tell-- I know how long it is done. But we-- I mean, at the time, 13 grand a year, 25 years ago, to go to middle school, right? Insane. And I applied, and I thought, my identity as a little kid, was I was just-- because we went to this school where, you know, the impoverished were bullying refugees, like, it was not-- it was the Wild West. It was not a good school. And I was pretty smart, but, like, they literally, remember eldest, we had the gifted and talented program, where it was literally, like-- - Gifted and talented. - It was like a-- it was next to the administrative offices. And it was like a room that housed, like, nine kids, and they were like, "All right, you guys might make it." And so, it was like, me, eldest, I'm serious, an elusive big P. - Oh, you guys were both-- - Dude, yeah, yeah. Exactly. They saw it. As soon as they taught eldest English, they're like, "Oh, no." - Yeah, I remember when they did that shit in, like, fourth and fifth grade. And you would just-- you would just feel so-- - I felt superior. - Well, I wasn't in it. So-- - Oh, yeah. You would watch, like, the two kids in your class stand up and be like, "All right, we have to go down." - Okay, time to-- - Okay. - And then you just sit there and you feel like a dumbass. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, everyone, we're going to take the children with potential out of the room. - Yeah. - Now that we've all had-- - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Now that we've all read a story of something, there's three hours a day away from all of you. - Dude, exactly. Oh, dude, and I, from the flip side, when we got the-- because that's exactly how I went, you would go to your class for, like, the beginning of the day, and there was some-- I don't remember elementary school now, some warm-up, some bullshit like that. And there was a moment where they call you up, and it was like, getting up to go to gate. I was-- I felt like the man. I was like, "All right, see you bozos later. Time to fucking apply myself." - Yeah, did you get, like, like, national honor society? - Yeah, like, yeah, in middle school. Yeah, I care-- and I didn't care about learning, I just liked the attention. - Right, right, right, yeah. - I didn't realize until very later, later life, I was like, "Oh, I only had good grades," because, like, that-- - I think about that a lot. - Yeah, like, I think back to the good grades I got, and I'm like, I feel like I should have-- I should remember something. - Yeah, right, right, right. - Like, I really did just, like, study to get the grade and forgot about all of the-- - 100%. - Yeah. - But also, that's life. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - No problem with those, anything. It's of a problem they have to solve for, like, a week or two. You solve it, and then you keep it pushing. But-- - Oh, actually. - But-- - Thank you, man. I'm-- - Wait, I think about that. - I'm wise as fuck. - Yeah. - It's just 11 years. - Yeah, I did this. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so, I remember being, like, so I went to these, like, exclusive schools, and I interviewed, and I did all this shit. And then I got in, but they wouldn't give me a scholarship. - Right. - And there's no way we could afford it. And my mom, I remember my mom, like, came, and she was like, "Don't-- She already was working two jobs." She was like, "I'll pick up more shifts." So, wait, she was like, "You don't have to do this." - No, yeah, it's not. - And then the way I coped with it is I made on N64, WWE No Mercy. And I created a version of the guy, the guy who interviewed me from that school. It was called-- It was the Gilman School in Baltimore. - Yeah, the Gilman School. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I literally just-- And in No Mercy, I made the guy who interviewed me, and I just, like, just beat the fuck out of him in a wrestling game. - Yeah. - I picked, like, fuck-- - Where did you guys, like, hang out in the summer? - The summer was, like, we-- well, sometimes we would go to-- I mean, every other year, my family would go to Greece, which was awesome, but we were just hanging out. Like, I was at my-- - I wouldn't be, like, the group of kids with the fuck-- with, like, their Gilman hoodie. - Oh, yeah. No, listen, that was the-- I didn't go to that, and it's the best thing that ever happened to me, because I would have become, like, a little-- like, I would have been the poor-- I would have been so much poorer than all those kids. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I would have tried to fit into people that, now, I hate-- - Right, right, right. - Like, I'm afraid I would have, like, become, like, I would have become, like, a fucking banker or something. - Like, I would have been the worst guy-- I've been some fat guy with plugs, with hair plugs that works at a bank in Baltimore right now. I would have the worst life, and be, like, isn't it? You know what? You know, I just think we need-- Look, I just think we don't need to talk about all this-- I don't-- it's nobody's business who's gay or not, but just people away from me. I would have been one of those guys, like, I would have been such a piece of shit. It's like, no, I'm just-- I just, like, lower taxes. I'm racist. Like, I would have been a piece of shit if I went to that school. I'm so-- my life-- and also, dude, I went to Baltimore City Public Schools. You had to be funny. You're, like, those things were fuck-- it was, like, the funniest people I will ever meet were, like, just, like, kids in seventh grade that I went to school with. - Did you guys have a rival school? - We had the-- so in Baltimore, there were two good high schools. - Yeah. - There was Polly and City, like, public schools. - Yeah. - And yeah, that was theoretically our rival school, but it was, like, there were no-- - There was no bad blood. - No print. Yeah, it was just, like, again, it was kind of, like, the gate program, writ large, where they were like, all right, these two schools, these kids might do something-- - Right, right. - And every other Baltimore City Public School was like, like, my-- they called them your zone school. - Right. - You know, kids were fucking-- my brothers-- my brothers didn't go to my middle school. They went to, like, still a-- a, like, you know, it was called the Ingenuity Project at the time, but it was just a shittier version of the one I went to. - Mm-hmm. like the first day my brother went to school, a kid was like, he was like, hey, yo, I like your pants. Give me them. Was that the run? He just like, huh? And he just fucking booked it. And the first day somebody tried to steal my brother's pants. And that was the third best public middle school. A kid got stabbed for his Charles art in that school. So it was like, that was, that's where the, there was more, it was like, intern school, Riley, not error, intro, not in, intern, whichever one of those, that means you ever see like, a lot of kids get stabbed and shit. I never saw, I did not see that. I saw a lot of kids get the fuck beat out of them. Yeah. Um, but, but, you know, that was, it was more just the verbal, it was just getting good at wrote. I didn't realize they were preparing me to be a roast comedian. Like, they were preparing me to be good at crowd work. Yeah, because that was, that's what the lunchroom was. It was like, you better, you better find someone to make fun of. If you're a white guy, yeah, in Baltimore city public schools, like, you better find somebody. I felt like it was pretty easy in my school to make people laugh because it was so, uh, I don't know, like the, it was a pretty, like, controlled environment. And like, everybody was pretty well behaved. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So just kind of doing something that was a little bit risky or dangerous was like, you could draw attention in the meeting. Right. You know, and I'm sure it was like the one as much as annoying as it is to be like, sent away and have to feel like it's kind of feels sort of like, really nice jail on. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, it was nice like being away from, like, parents kind of away. Like, like, you had a sense of responsibility or, you know, you didn't have to, like, you could actually, like, mess up and deal with that on your own without being yelled at. Totally. Because it's illegal for your teachers to, like, like, you know, curse. Discipline you. Yeah. You'd be a little piece of shit. Yeah. And also you're there with, like, all boys sucks, but it's also, we had girls. We had girls. Oh, you did have girls. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't realize that. Oh, that's insane. Yeah. But, uh, but most of your time in the dorms and shit, you're with the food. Yeah. Yeah. It's, uh, it was great, actually. Like, I, but when I went to film the holdovers, my senior year, my room was connected to my best friends room. Oh, hell yeah. And he was like, is it okay if I, uh, like, use your room for some more space? Oh, Larry. I came back. He had a two bedroom. My bed was gone. Yeah. It was like, it was like for, uh, like, plug in grittles. And like, yeah, like a mini fridge with, like, eggs bacon. Oh, yeah. Yeah. A bedroom for TVs. Respect. This guy sounds awesome. Let's double stack couches. So it was like movie theaters. Hell. Yeah. Yeah. It was awesome. You must have gone. I mean, I mean, boarding school, though, there must have been some, like, legitimately evil people. Like, there must have been like, oh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. You know, made money off of genocide. Oh, yeah. It's just like oil people. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's tough. When you think about, like, who was like, who you're brushing your teeth next? Yeah. I bet if you, we looked up some of the motherfuckers you graduated with right now, it's like, oh, they're the people destroying the world. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They're next up. Was the, how's the food at boarding school? Pretty good. Yeah. Sometimes better than, I mean, I felt bad for a lot of the people that worked in the dining hall because, of course, like, they would try and make like really nice things. But the only time the kids got excited was when they made, like, chicken ten. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like Buffalo chicken balls. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's like shrimp scampie and we're like, boo. I want fucking chicken and ranch. Get me mcribs. Bring in some mcribs and serve ice cream. That's what we, we did like my senior year. I guess like we can, I mean, nobody's gonna fucking can't get in trouble now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Let me tell you right now. You don't have to worry about your headmaster. But um, senior year, we, when I came back from shooting that movie, I had a car with me. And I was like, I don't have time to go all the way home. Right. I have to bring my car back to school. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So like otherwise, you needed some like crazy exemption. Like the only, the only other kid who had a car on campus, he had cancer. And he had. Right. Right. Right. Right. Right. You know, like he needed to go. Of course. You needed that fucking car. Of course. Of course. Of course. Um, but I was able to bring it back. And they were like, you just can't drive it. You have to turn in the key to like the, um, on the grounds people. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But I had an extra key that I kept for myself. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And me and my, my best friend in high school, we, he made like a fake Snapchat account. And we decided we were going to go sell like fast food to the campus. And, and yeah, we started with Chick-fil-A because like, you could do it out. You could Uber Eats McDonald's. I think you other places, but Chick-fil-A was like, right. These kids that have had it in months, you know, been there all the winter. Yes. It's the longest term. Yes. So we knew this was like an untapped. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Um, so he made this account. And we had, I mean, like basically half the school, like probably like 400 orders. Incredible. Immediately immediately, I mean, like throughout like the weekend, we said like, Oh, wow. One weekend will throughout the week. I guess I put it up on Wednesday. Yeah. Yeah. Order coming in Friday night. Oh, you're doing like catering. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You're already the big ass kid. Did you get caught? Or did you do? No. So what we did was we had all the orders in. And we, uh, I guess, yeah, we had like $2,000 Venmo. In front of we up charts. I mean, we were we were chart. We was like, yeah, like 15 bucks virtually. Sam, you're selling, you're selling the son of the guy works at Raytheon. Yeah. And we're also, I mean, the risk we're running. Of course. Yeah. There's probably. There's costs associated. Yeah. Yeah. That's really funny. And we drove the car through like the cornfields in the back of the school. And then like two and a half hours. Chick-fil-a. That's so funny. Two hours. Yeah. Yeah. And like that guy, the guy, the people there, I don't fucking down the street. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. It's like, it's far in order. So the guy. That's so funny. We go, we order it. And they were like, we're gonna have to talk to the chef. And then we, they were like, we need, give us like 20 minutes and the chef will come out and talk. That's so funny. So you hadn't planned ahead. No, we didn't call them. Yeah. We went to the register. Yeah. I know. I know. I know. I know. Like $2,000 worth of nuggets, please. Quickly. So. Yeah. So that's hilarious. We were like, all right. We might be screwed. But the guy came out and he had so much energy and he was so excited to do the order for us. Wow. And the people working behind the register were fighting to ring us up because it was like a record for that store. Interesting. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They took our photo. Yeah. That's somebody you get hot. Yeah. This is your principal. Yeah. What the fuck? The assholes doing on the wall in a Chick-fil-A in Jersey. Yeah. Yeah. But we got them, we picked up the order. It was like four giant catering boxes. Hell yes. Got it back. And I think we both profited like 50 bucks. We were heroes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody. Yeah. That's incredible. Yeah. I mean, I sold weed in high school. And I remember being like, I remember being like, wow, I probably made like five, I'm like, probably five, ten grand going into college. And I never, I never kept track. Anytime I wanted to order food or buy booze or, you know, do anything. Go to the movies. I would just take it from my weed thing. And then let's get it. Yeah. Let's get a nice fresh A and W for the boy. And I remember being like, nice, I'm going to go into college like rich, dude. And I had after a year of selling weed $200. Like I smoke anytime I want to eat. I would just smoke my own weed. I never wanted to buy chicken wings or Chinese where I would just get that. And I just used all the money in me. I didn't save anything. I was just, it was so funny. I was selling it. Yeah. Yeah. In my, in my mom's home, like sell it using her weight watcher scale to sell weed. Yeah. He was, it was, I mean, yeah, the ocean city was such a joke sometimes. Like we were selling, me and my friend were selling fake IDs for one summer. Awesome. And we sold fake IDs to like a 19 year old cop. He's like, our friend, a cop breaking the law. Yeah. Yeah. He was like, he was like, our boy, he was like, our boy in that summer, he became like a reticop on the board. Awesome. That's a hilarious job. That was 90. Like I don't respect anyone who's a rent a cop, but a 19-year-old telling me to keep it moving. Right. Right. How about you suck my dick or child? I'll do whatever I want. Go get your dad. Maybe I'll respect him. Dude, that's hilarious. We got to, we got to, we got to do some calls. But I also real quick. Yeah. Geomoddy was the man, right? Oh, he seems like the fucking man. Honestly, like, yeah, he's, he's the goat. Yeah. I really, I really think he's the best actor. Dude, he's such a great actor. I've yet to meet someone to work with someone who I've been like, uh, I don't know, that kind of just taken it back by how cool and humble. Yeah, talented. They are 100% yeah, and I do my favorite thing about geometry and you don't have to comment on this if you don't want to He was he's got a the scene there. He did a scene in billions Where he like had hired a like a hot dominatrix. Yeah, and then yeah on a red carpet or like at some party There was a pictures of him with her just hanging out He like spit game to the dominatrix and I was like Salute. Yeah respect you're just a little fucked up looking guy You're getting these hot girls. I was like you are my hero, sir Yeah, but like if I could get like if I could do like point One percent of the character actor career the Giamatti has and then also pull like Giamatti pulls dude He's a have you ever seen you ever seen that movie what's it called Barney's Barney's version Barney's something? No, I haven't what's it called? You look it up. I might be remiss remembering the tireless movie just yeah Look Paul Giamatti movie let's see what else is amazing. I'll check it out Barney's version. Barney's version Yeah, it plays like a badass and like he's like cool. That's awesome I like what and what's interesting too is like I love that because it's like you know now I mean especially his character the holdover is like the least cool guy in the world. Yeah, but yeah So awesome, but that's what else love but Antonio's career like in Spain his early movies. He plays fucking weirdos And he plays like nerds. Yeah, yeah, what it's so weird like these guys are such good actors that you see them And you're like they can embody anything that they feel like Also like the people that Like all the actors that have Tony was worked with to like it's insane watch all of his old movies like crazy It's insane the people that are like these worked with yeah And he's he's had an insane career and he's played every type of guy and yeah I mean, I we were just re-watched desparado. I just got a dude. Yeah, I just got amazing like stunt sequences Incredible, so fun such a great movie and like he looks such he's such a badass in that yeah I just got a nice you guys see the new apartment. I got I got a like The sick TV and I'm going I'm becoming a I'm becoming a like 4k guy like my favorite movies I just want to have them in the best resolution like I just want to I just want to and I got surround sound I'll be coming like a home feel like I want to be home. You still have that same TV that you it's here now. Oh, okay Yeah, the hundred inch. Yeah, yeah, it's too big for my apartment dude. Yeah, yeah, I had to settle for a 75 I feel like these are better Joe says they're better than projectors. I think so I mean projectors are paying the ass Like what the best projector you can get I mean listen if you get the best projector. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah You're you're like you're really cooking. Yeah, the thing projectors have is that and I know this because I've been shopping for I've been thinking about gigantic televisions the last two years When you go over 85 inches like after when you go over yeah 85 like every inch is like $500 so like a hundred like we got that the hundred inch TV It was like an open box thing and I got it so cheap, but like a hundred inch like a really good hundred inch TV cost like $15,000 so like a projector you get like for a thousand bucks or whatever even cheaper if you want to you get a really nice one $3,000 and it can be a hundred fifty like so that's if you want huge go projector Yeah, but if you need anything 85 and under just go TV. They're also projectors are kind of a pain in the ass to get going Yeah, I've never I've not gotten to the stage of my life yet where I can like Not break a TV. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so I go for like the $80 Roque of course the road you said reach the buy. Yeah, we could play yeah Because we didn't have we needed to buy a separate TV to move from set Dude, I've purchased so many Life absolutely dude. I have so many random Roku remote All right, well listen, we we could talk all day, but we got it. We also got to help the people. We need we need doms You know, this man has so much life experience Share it with the people, so why don't we hit the visible hotline eldest and of course let's remind people go see Tony What do you do? Yeah, this we need me. This is gonna be so big for the if you like either one of us Seeing this movie would be huge for both of us. Yeah, this motherfucker. This is actually really big for us With this good, you know, I'm you know, I want to play a fat bully and every Hollywood movie from now I want to be the first call when they're like we need a fat bully Let's get hell kiss on the line. You know, that's if this goes well and then dumb look this kid's gonna be fine either way Really, I'm the one who needs it. This kid's gonna be a movie for the rest of his life But if this fucking bombs, I'm fucked guys all right, so go see Tony right now If you're in New York, early and next week it opens everywhere and by the way Grit like It cuts across like I literally saw with my mom. I saw they're like little kids at the premiere who had a good time It is a it is an awesome movie that and fun watch and like we said Kurt like match team It's so good that they edited this movie. This is like a fun summer hangout movie like yeah, there's so many ways to it and fucking Mike our Balmond yeah guy did one battle after another did this yeah Yeah, yeah, I wonder if you had more other how did we do? How did we get that? I don't know That's the one with my what we told me that was he was like Matt was like that's because I remember my first day on set I looked at I looked in the camera. I was like what the fuck? Yeah, I was like dude. This is insane This like and you know, I like Matt, but yeah, and his shit. They do so much document. I mean blackberry's cool looks good But like never on the band shows like that's it's not it doesn't look good Yeah, I think he gave Matt so much freedom to just like chill with us and totally like yes work with us Exactly Mike got to do all the yeah, and I remember being like dude. How the what is this is looks incredible? He's like that's PTA's guys like what I was like fuck yeah, dude But it looks awesome. It's a summer hangout movie with a bunch of incredible the cast is so good But also it's edited in a way that's not because those movies sometimes in my experience can be a little lack of daisicle It's about the hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, this movie it's quick under two hours. Yeah, and you're never bored even though You know stuff happens, but it's like there's set pieces. It's just like yeah. Yeah, it's just vibes between characters and you're gonna love it but Tell us what you think about it. Hey watch the fucking movie or else you mother Elvis play us some calls buddy. Hey Stavvy eldest and guest I'm a huge fan of the podcast. Thank you for everything. Thank you for all the laughs um So my girlfriend and I have been together for about eight months. I love her to death. She's the best person I've ever met We have such a great relationship She is also absolutely beautiful. She is stunning. She's an 11 out of 10 She's incredibly nice, and one of the smartest people I've ever met All things funny and I just feel so lucky to be with her. What's the but what's the but and with that being said She is incredibly out of my league Um, I wouldn't consider myself Unattractive however, I am not caliber um, I can believe in you and that's honestly made me feel better about myself because You know, I I must be a good enough person to To be with her and and she's you know, uh, she must find me attractive. How do you say oldies? Um, I don't really you know I don't really think about that all that often. You clearly do. It's clearly keep open when I get clear It's the thing you think about the most in your life Without question that ponds you every moment gosh anyway keep going um However, when we go out in public um And we interact with You know like a server or a bartender or maybe I'm being is you disabled brother one of the okay That's what they say when there's people always write comments saying You know, oh bro, she's way out of your league like how how did someone like you? Oh my They say that to your face That is wild. This is like all right. I see what's going on here. Let's let him finish I know it's yeah, yeah, yeah, and you know, she could do so much better and I can I can take a joke. I don't necessarily take it to heart Um, you do is after eight months of this consistently happening I do think sometimes like, you know, why is she with me and whatever Um, it does you know after after it's consistently been told to me it does Kind of I do think about it more often um, so I know this is necessarily not gonna change But uh, how could that maybe go about dealing with this? Uh, better um, thank you guys I appreciate it. I love the podcast. This is uh funny. Yeah This is so awesome and also yeah, you you have no idea what to say dumb. This you've never had this problem in your life Oh, what do you mean? Everybody says we're both hot when I'm with the model Everyone no one even thought looks at us. We're two. I'm with a woman that people are afraid to stare in the eyes I'll take this one, Dom Uh, this literally this is so clearly a mindset thing because I loved I did when I was when I would when I when uh, when people now it's like, I don't know now Once you kind of once you're famous or whatever and your life it people sort of know who you are becoming a like being like notable being like a notable comedian, whatever. I always say it kind of feels like becoming a hot girl because you get attention. You get so much unwanted attention from men. - Right, right, right, right. - You walk the streets and it's like you know, like not everybody, but every once in a while someone like you feel them lock eyes with you, like you feel their gaze on the back of your head. And so now if people seem with a hot woman, they're like, all right, well he's, now they don't give me credit. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, I always fucking wrench the shirt and I give him, which also I don't give a fuck. But this was my, when I was broke, this, you know, I don't want to do my own horn. I was, I always always punching above my weight class, metaphorically, I was clearly not, well, maybe who knows? But, who know, I'm not everybody sometimes. But, I loved it. I loved getting a glance from a guy. I was like pissed. Like when I'm walking down the street with a hot, with a hot girl and I was bald and toothless, people would be like, what the fuck, people were mad. It was the best feeling of my life. For I was like, not yet. And I hope you, go, go do some fucking pull-ups. (laughing) I have, I don't need all this to achieve what you can't even get. But your problem so clearly is you don't believe in yourself. - Right. - Because I know people thought that about me when I was with a hot woman. Nobody said it to my face. Like I was, 'cause I wasn't acting, like I was happy to be there. I wasn't acting like it was a fucking make-a-wish. You know, like you're with your girlfriend. Who loves you, who you've been with for eight months, and you're like, you wanna fucking sweepstakes, bro. I bet you it's your body language. It's you're embarrassed, you're sheepish to be around her. You have to believe in yourself. This is an aura problem. 'Cause these guys see you. And what they're doing is letting her know they would fuck you in front of you. (laughs) That about you at all. That is literally some like this. What's happening is you are quite literally being Alfred in front of your girl, and she really does like you, because this is the kind of behavior. If you put up with this too much, it's like that's unattractive. You, who you are is not unattractive. She likes you. What could possibly be a problem is you just getting fucking you constantly being a pushover like, they're like, whoa, how did you get her? And you're like, I know, you can't be happy with that. You're like, oh, good one, pal, you gotta get back at them. I don't even know what to say, because. - I think the key is what he said was like, I don't know why this person is with me. And like, you know, you should be able to come up, think to yourself, why, outside of your physical disappointment. Yeah, you're not as hot as her. I got used for you. - That's a massive compliment. When a beautiful woman wants, you know what I mean? Like, I never wanna feel like, I love when there's a, when the woman I would, is way more attractive than I am. - That's what you want. - Of course, yeah. - You're like, oh no, I've achieved an awesome thing. - Yeah, yeah. - And look, here's the thing, we know how society works. Here's the thing, let me also take a little sting off this. Unfortunately, life is worse for women. They do have to, on average, end up with someone that looks worse than them. - Right. - So, that's just reality, bro. That's, we live in, but you know, this is a paternalistic society, that's a problem. We should, you know, take steps to fix it. But right now, we're not changing that within your lifetime. So, a, so really what this comes down to is, yes, she's with you for a fucking reason. This is a self-esteem thing, bro. Why do you, let's even take your girlfriend out of this. Why do you feel this way about yourself? I'm like, what is it? And really think about it. And I'm sure there are reasons, because look, sure, I'm talking, I'm talking a big game now, whatever. And I, I'm at the point of my life now. And I was at the point of my life when I was like, 25, where I liked that attention. And I also was pretty, come back. I mean, look, I like, I could also, I just, I also knew that I could, if this guy tried to get at me, I knew I could insult anyone better than they could. So, yeah, I know, it's not the same thing. I get that. I had something in my back pocket and an anger problem and a chip on my shoulder. So I did like it. And maybe you're just like a, you know, maybe you're not, that's not how you're built. You don't like confrontation, whatever. And not that I do either. I just, in specific circumstances, I did. But this is not even about your girlfriend. This is about what you think about yourself. Right. You, you are allowed, you are putting out the energy that says, come disrespect me in front of my beautiful girlfriend, you gotta change that. That's the problem. And so like, think, like, what's good about you? We'd be realistic or you're like, she's with you for a reason. And stop acting like you want to contest. You start acting like you, you deserve to be there. And this is a little tough because this is a nebulous problem. I almost want to talk to this guy. Maybe you want to talk to him. Well, honestly, like, and thinking about what are the, like, what were the things that, how did you portray yourself at first with this person? Like, did you kind of give a false, a false image of yourself, right? That you're, you're having a hard time living up to that now. And, and you're, in your coming to terms with the fact that she's, maybe she fell in love with a persona that you would put interesting something that you projected. Right. That's, that's definitely a possibility. Maybe that's, maybe that's the root of his insecurity. But whatever it is, it is based in insecurity. Right. And so figure that out, dude. And I'm sorry because I, I mean, there's not much we can tell you other than believe in yourself. But you cannot let that slide. I got to be honest with you. You cannot let people talk to you that way. How are you a server, a fucking guy? You don't know it all. He's at work. He could get in trouble for this. They're not allowed to fucking tell the customers they're ugly. What the fuck is she doing? That's a nothing. That's, this guy was, this guy thinks he has, you're such a little threat that he is willing to break the rules of his workplace. And, and by the way, you're paying the tab. Yeah. But I don't need a tip. Right. I just want this hot girl to know I'd from a way he's dead. That's how much they don't respect you. So you have to fix that. And I know that is not good. That is not, I'm not giving you concrete stuff. Because we need to, I need to know what the root of your insecurity is. Is it in your, look, if you, if, and it's, and while you're, and they're, you know, this is a two-prong solution. Figuring out the roots of your insecurity takes time, right? This is like therapy stuff is thinking about what, what, this was the first conversation Stavros and I ever had. That actually is, oh my God, that's true. In the parking lot, we were talking about that. Nice to meet you. I need some advice. Yeah, that is really true, Ag. Oh my God, that's so fucking funny. We immediately started talking about, yes, girl, girl problems. This, dude, you have to fully yourself, you have to do, and look, like I said, macro, work on the root of it. Micro though, if you really do want to go about it this way, start fucking improving yourself. Eventually, you need to convince yourself you are enough. But in the meantime, if you want to hit the gym, if you want, if you want to dress a little better, if you want to, if you want to, I don't know, literally practice your public speaking so that when these guys mock you, you have some way to get back at them. I don't know what it is in the short term. I've always, I've always said for me, like, it really was, I mean, I, there was one summer I went to the gym and I just got the confidence of getting into better shape, whatever. I got a girlfriend, immediately got fed a shit. Immediately, like, once I had the girl, and I was like, I'm done, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I learned that's not how you do that. But I will, that helps me that, and I also, during that relationship, made the decision to do stand up and was so much happier than I was when I was in college and trying to have a regular, you know, you know, life, whatever. And those things did it for me and find a version of that for you. I don't know what it is, you know, you said, did he say he has a good job? Did he say anything like that? He was just talking about himself. Get good at golf, right? Golfing? Yeah, golfing's a, yeah, yeah. And he's honestly, any skill is important, right? Golf can suck my dick. Take some cooking class. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely. Fucking, yeah, get what, yeah. Take her to see Tony out and see. Yeah, yeah. Take her to have a, yeah, every, every call we work in. And by the way, Tony, but hey, nice date night. Yeah. Let's see food dinners and then go see Tony. And if the waiter is like, well, look at this hunched over piece of shit, you're with ma'am. Punch him in the fucking jaw hall, no. Don't do any violence, don't do any crimes. Also, legally, you don't listen to anything we say. There's pure entertainment. But, but yeah, you gotta believe in yourself. That is the problem here. That is the, that is at the root of this. And I know that's easier said than done, but you can fix this. She's with you for a reason. What else we got, L.B.? Well, the, um, Stavvy, L this esteemed guest, I'm 24 from the Pacific Northwest. Um, basically, just wanted to call in because I'm in a two year relationship. Lovely girl, um, I plan on marrying her in the future and she's awesome. Uh, and I've got some homies who we used to be friends back in high school, pretty gone close. And now I join the military for a little while and then just came back and we've been reconnecting. But me and them and my girl have all been hanging out together and stuff like that. To preface this, one of them is definitely gay. He used to be by the outies. Definitely gay now. Um, I would say I am probably pretty darn straight. - Oh, okay. - Now? (laughing) - What's going on with this? Everyone in the crew tries on sexuality, which is cool. No judgment, but it is. You did gotta catch us off of your heart. I'm confused about what it's like. I don't know where this is going. And I can't wait to find out, eldest. - I back in high school kind of fucked around with this dude 'cause I was open to that idea. - Yeah, yeah. - Get more. - You and your mojemen puttin' this. - Fuckin' each other. - In his butt, he put it in mine. (laughing) - Just little stuff. - Hell with this dude. - You know what? These are good friends. (laughing) - That's a really good pal. I will say all this, you know, that is, I rarely do I hear about a friend group closer than ours. - This is why he went to the military. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. Exactly, get out of his system. But even in the throes of desperation, we were just virgins with no way out. - We've been through a lot together. I don't think I could put it in your ass. - No, first of all, I would fuck your ass. - Sure, he's like, "Let's get that very clear right now." - Or vice versa, he's saying it vice versa. I wouldn't, but if push came to shove, I would fuck your ass. - Wait, but this is the guy, the same guy that he's. - I believe, yes, his buy friend was really, he used to hook up with his key friend. - Did he fucked around with him? - Yes, yes. Keep going old, I'm interested. - Little stuff. Anyways, didn't want to knock it till I tried it, type thing, we tried it. Very not really not yet, but just isn't for me kind of thing. Fast forward to the day. We all hang out now again, that have kind of reconnected. And I don't feel like this is way on my shoulder. I've been seeing it a couple of years. (laughing) Connected. And I don't feel like it's a huge way on my shoulders because, you know, I'm not feeling too fruity these days. However, I just want to know if I'd be doing my girlfriend at this service by not telling her, that's because we're all hanging out again these days. And also she's like, pink hair, very liberal. I see, you know, let me see you kiss a boy, type, it's like, I don't think she'd be that mad about it. My one reservation is, I don't want her to see him differently or be like, it's weird and all hanging out now. I don't know, she knows he's gay, but doesn't know that I've done all that with him. Anyways, love the show, but yeah, peace. Respect. Well, I don't know, man, let's put this pink hair to the test. (laughing) Let's see if that haircut is earned, you know? 'Cause if she-- She or she or she writes, don't understand. 'Cause if she, yeah, if she wants, literally the problem might be, she hears about this. This is kind of the reverse of like, usually it's, this happens in the reverse, where like a guy, you know, a girl is bi or maybe you experimented, and she tells her, you know, straight boyfriend. And he's like, "Oh, good, I fuck both of you." You know what I mean? Like, usually that, this might be the reverse, where if you have kind of like a queer girlfriend or like just an open girl who wants you to be a little gay, and you tell her you used to do gay shit, she might want to watch you suck dick. Right, it sounds like, yeah, it sounds like it's more about, well, the way she's surrounding it, it's more about the tension between the friend group that he's trying to avoid. Yeah. I think you're fine with the gay thing. For sure. Like, she doesn't not gonna give a fuck about that. I don't think so. Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. But, I don't know, like, trying to put myself in this position. Well, it's like, it's like, it is just like-- Yeah, if you were hooking up, like let's say a girl-- Right, yeah, that's what I'm trying to think. Okay. What would I tell, and she was my friend, and this was like, like, I don't know, I probably wouldn't say anything. I know, it's like-- I wonder if the juice is worth the squeeze. Right, right, right. It's like, I think, well, I don't know. I wonder how the friend feels, too. That's a good point. I wonder what his vibe is. Like, is he wanting to read, I don't know. I don't think, I mean, that's not what I-- That's not the vibe I'm getting at this. I think that-- so yes, we have kind of two separate issues here. One is a kind of classic dilemma, which is, do you tell your partner-- A lot of people have friends that they maybe used to date or hooked up with or whatever. Now, for me, I'm at the point of my life where the people who I'm friends with that I dated or used to hook up with, that was so long ago. It doesn't even feel like the same person anymore, right? But when this guy-- this kid's 24, he said, and this was high school, for you, that was a long time ago. I mean, high school, 24, you went to the army, you've lived a completely different life. You're a completely, a completely different life. And also, high school and college is like so. You kind of do get a pass for experimenting overall. So it's like, in general, would I tell my significant others, like, hey, my friend, we used to hook up a little bit. Like, it wasn't serious, whatever. We're totally friends. I don't know if it's the kind of thing you even have to make a big-- if it comes up. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. It's just like, hey, what's that? Then you'd be like, oh, yeah, we hooked up a couple of times. Because it doesn't sound like you even-- it'd be different if you guys straight up dated. Like, if it was your boyfriend for a year or whatever, that's a little different. And you can say it just what it was. Because it's not something you have to underplay. Exactly. You're like, yeah, we fucked around a little bit. I was curious. It ends up-- it wasn't really my thing. But whatever, if it comes up, I would say it. But I don't know that you have to make this big declaration. I wouldn't lose sleep over it. I wouldn't lose sleep. I think it's fine. I think it's the kind of thing where you-- Yeah, exactly. Stop thinking about it. Right, right. Because your boy probably doesn't give a fuck. Yeah, you're-- In fact, he's probably like-- You're creating this thing in your mind that really doesn't exist, maybe, you know? Totally, especially with his girlfriend. Of course. Would it be a little different if you were dating somebody who was like a fucking bigot? Sure. Right, right. I probably wouldn't be dating that person anyway, right? Yeah, yeah. So to me, dude, I think you're just kind of overthinking this. It's like, if he wasn't-- If it was a-- well, now I'm actually thinking, though, because I was going to say, if he was a girlfriend, right? Right, right, right. I could see-- I still think you probably don't tell her unless it comes up. If you're like, yeah, I'm going to have a couple of times. We're mostly friends, especially somebody who's like, young-- she seems to be cool and like-- She's actually liberated all that kind of stuff. This is a minor blip. It's fun. It's a funny aspect of your-- And it doesn't sound like it was something serious. I don't know, it's not like it was like a serious relationship. So I say, only bring it up if it comes up. And when it comes up, don't be all nervous and weird about it if it does, you'd be like, oh, yeah, I mean, you know, we used to go up, he was by back then. I was curious. He's clearly gone his direction. I've gone my direction. And all that might happen is she might want to make you do more gay stuff. I think that's the most likely outcome if you tell her. She's like, oh, really? Because I do. If I'm dating someone, she's like, yeah, I used to go with-- I'm like, can I see you? Can I see you? What's the last time you put it to you? And can it be soon? And can it happen again? So yeah, you're fine, dude. But shout out to you. Shout out to you. I wonder if you-- did you do any gay stuff in the army? Is my question. Yeah. It feels like you probably would just-- He came back straight. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You got to imagine something like that. Yeah, that's Pete Hague says. Going to put that on the brochure. Send your gay jokes in the army. We'll make them straight. Go, go, go, go. I went in by, but I saw some shit over there. Well, yeah, you see such unspeakable horrors. And it takes away the delights of homosexuality. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Next question, LD. Hi, I saw a-- and a steam's guess. Been a fan for a long time. I've been doing online therapy for anxiety, which basically means that my therapist and I meet online instead of in person. And it's been going really well. But my therapist said, tell me that she uses AI to take notes from our sessions. And different books. That's been going really well. But I don't know how to feel about AI having all of my therapy thoughts in some kind of cloud somewhere. So just wondering what your thoughts are on AI having notes from therapy sessions. Love you, love the show. Thank you. Interesting. Yes. Well, look, there's a little-- look, the thing about AI that's interesting is that they're basically calling like eight different technologies, AI, right? They're calling-- now it's become a branding. It's like when Wagoo, everyone's claiming every beef was Wagoo beef. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know this fucking deli doesn't have the Wagoo chop and chips. I know it's not the same that they got in fucking Japan. Right, right, right. And so it is like, yes, using it to draw or write paragraphs for you or some shit like that, you're corny. You're a corny bitch if you do that. But using it for transcription, it's-- It's like a practical-- Exactly. Using it, or like there's so many technologies like Photoshop-- what is Photoshop other than AI? Like some Photoshop plugins, if they existed And if they were creating Photoshop now, they would say check out AI or AI tool. Where it's like, it's just a technology. A lot of this is just technology. Right, right. When we edit the podcast, there's tools where you could like line up the sound with the video, right? Instead of doing it step by step yourself. That shit, who cares about that? That's no big deal. But the privacy concern is a different thing, right? So I would say, I would just have the conversation with her where it's like, hey, I'm a little worried about, you know, any of my personal information getting, I don't know with this company. And I think, yeah, if she's not open to, I don't know if it's he or she, whatever. You're not open. Therapist, yeah. Taking handwritten notes or whatever, you would make you feel more comfortable than getting a therapist, you know? That's not a good therapist. Yeah, exactly, or you could even, yeah, exactly. 'Cause if you're saying, hey, this is, you're somebody with anxiety. Are they stealing my data? You know, that's so fucked up of your therapist to do. So I would say, just have the conversation and be like, hey, I get it. You need this to review the notes, but is it possible for you to use this to transcribe and then keep the notes off the cloud? And then have my name not a source. 'Cause the other thing is she probably, or he or she does, probably doesn't have your name. I would hope not. Or like, tell them to store all the information under a different name, or this is mostly a privacy concern. This is just a privacy concern. Yeah. And it would kind of be the same if, I mean, let's be real. If your therapist took hand, typed the notes and had your name on it and just had it on Google Drive, it's still, who knows the fuck I'm doing? Well, I imagine for this, you probably have to fuck me. Not so good, dude. Imagine they probably have to be recording, right? Right, right. Oh, that's great point. So I guess what I would do is just have the conversation with them and be like, look, take notes fine after our session, but afterwards, if you could put them in a localized, you know, put it on your computer and delete whatever the fuck don't have my shit in the cloud. And who knows, you don't even really, I bet you don't even know what they might be doing this anyway, right? If they're a good therapist who understands patient confidentiality, they're not gonna have your shit on fucking, you know, on their notes app, you know, like, so that's what I would say. This is just a conversation. This is a pure, this is a conversation thing. And I will say, as somebody with anxiety, it's not a bad conversation to practice, right? Like, practice setting a boundary, even with your mental health professional. If anyone should understand, screw it. If you're a theater, if you're fucking therapist, like, fuck you. Then they don't care about you and get a different therapist. But I don't think that's what's gonna happen. I understand your worry, but I think this is actually a not a big deal. And that's coming for me. I've been very vocal on the whole thing. So yeah, you're good. Keep doing therapy. We're proud of you, you know, and just have the conversation. You're gonna have to be a therapist. We got something fun out of this here, something fun to go out on. Sure. And you know what, what we do, actually, I want it done. You've done such a great job podcasting. I want to present you your whites. I want to present you your chef. You've earned your podcasting whites. There you go, chef. Yeah, keep the tag. We're fucking returning both these immediately. I'm basically doing a shitty version of Brittany broski's like royal court. Stavros Halcus is fucking shitty kitchen. Brittany, come on the pod, please. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Brand you, dude. That's this, that's the smell of podcasting. Beautiful, man, beautiful. Yeah, you look good. This is more like, I feel like we're in a bakery. I know. For real, dude, I'm here about to think some chickens in the machine that per do. Yeah, and like the toothpaste factory. Yeah, this really, this is not, nobody actually cooks in this shit. You got to be making like Chris, the fluffiest croissants in the world. Yeah, yeah, just like this. All right, Aldi, what do we got? What's our final call here? Don't let me down. Hey, Stav, long time listen to our big fan. Um, I've got a friend I've known since high school. We probably met at 15 or 29 now. So like 15 years almost, um, and high school were both like. I don't know. I was always kind of fat, but he was a skinny dude, but now he's fat. Mm hmm. And he's like, you know, been creeping closer to bring under pound. I think he's like two 80 right? We regularly, oh, so he's not that weird. Oh, so he's got just 10 pounds overweight. Oh, it's not a big deal. Next question. That's the show. We're going to pound, but maybe they're like two 80 right? We regularly weigh ourselves in our friend group because we're like mental, you know, well, is he sure that five, seven? Well, then it's a problem, but five, seven, two 80. I mean, that's a normal dimensions for a guy to be. Um, but he has no intention of ever losing weight and he eats like shit. He works from home, he smokes weed all day. Sounds cool. And I've been trying to convince him that it'd be hilarious if he got to 300 pounds. So I was just hoping and he's a big fan of yours. I was hoping that I was a fellow fan guy. He said, help me get him to turn around. I'm like 250 myself. I, you know, for me, so any advice you could give to help me. Give him to them. This is awesome, dude. Yeah, this is, I mean, you want to get your point of be three. I will say I kind of know what he means. Yeah, it would be funny to say you weigh 300 pounds. That's, that's, that's a badge of honor. Very few of us get to wear. Right. Uh, that's so funny. All right. Well, I would say he's well on his way, right? He's, as someone who got to 300 pounds, smoking weed and eating like shit every day, that's the secret. That's the way to do it. What's his ice cream consumption? Like that could be, if he's not, if he's not eating ice cream, he's making a big mistake. Because in terms of gaining weight fast, get him on the pines. Get him on a pint of Ben and Jerry's. We've talked, that's, that's a big lore of this podcast as me, me and eldest when we lived together in a story, there was, there was literally a time where we averaged a pint in a half a day. We and eldest were spending, when we were broke, by the way, we did the math. I was, I think there was a couple of months I spent more on ice cream than rent. Because my rent was $500 a month at the time. And a pint of Ben and Jerry's was $6. Yeah. Is that by far like the most effective food that put it on ice cream is the devil when it comes to it? Like when you're trying to stick, because it's like a pint of Ben and Jerry's has a thousand calories. Oh, yeah. If you need the whole thing. Yeah, yeah. I guess it's a lot of fat, right? A lot of fat. Yeah. A lot of toxins. Yeah. Easy brother. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no, yeah. Man, I'm, now I'm fucking about to go buy a pint. I'm reminiscing. Fuck. And I was. Anyway, ice cream. Look, what? Because he's eating like shit. But dessert is really the solution here. Yeah. You want to get him to 300 pounds. Eating bad savory, everybody can, everybody can go, you know, get some chicken tenders and fries. Can you then follow it up with an even more caloric dessert? Right. That's where we separate the men from the boys. Yeah. We separate the true eaters. And so that's what I'd say. If your friend really wants it, smoke more meat. The secret is smoking weed between meals. You want to smoke weed right before dinner. And then you got to get the second, the second one, like, oh, fuck, I'm full. I'm ready to go. I'm ready to go. I'm ready to go. I will say that the reason, because I'm on GLP ones every, every time I stop smoking weed for like a week. I lose like 10 pounds on these and, and, and, and, and, but, I feel like if you smoke before you sleep, too, then you wake up hungry. Yeah. It does something. You wake up in a groggy, hungry state. Yeah. And so, yeah, I would say the solution is he's going to have to, if he really wants this, he's going to have to smoke more weed and eat more ice cream. That's good for us. Go see Tony in theaters now, New York in LA, everywhere next week, uh, Dom, I mean, that's all you got to plug. That's, that's a nice thing about being an actor though. You fucking have one big project. Yeah. Watch Tony. Watch Tony. We're both in it. We're both in it. Um, and, uh, yeah, it was a black, truly, the movie, I don't know, man, I, I really, I watched it. Again, I watched the premiere. I watched it with my mom at the Museum of the Moving Image and not to be corny. You know, we hate to be sincere here, but I, fuck, I really feel like we, we did something special. I mean, you and Matt really fucking pulled it off, bro. So you should be really proud of yourself, my friend and folks, go see the, truly, go see the movie. I really believe in it. And I do think you're going to have an excellent time. So we'll see you next time. Bye, bye. And, uh, Uncle, stop September 8th on Netflix and actually tires out this week, I believe, too. So a lot of shit going on. It's the summer of stop. Uh, see you guys next week. Bye. [Music]