#144 - Reading More Brutal Movie Reviews

Hi, welcome to Smoshmouth. I'm Shane. And I'm Amanda. And we have, wow, such a wonderful guest for us. You guys have not seen him yet on this pod. His name is Ian Heakocks. Right. Hello. Hi. I'm happy to be here. I love what you guys are doing. This your first time on the new set? Yeah. Oh my God. When he first walked in, he didn't know which chair to sit in. Yeah. Can you believe it? He was like, "Do I host this show?" Yeah. You were like the middle done. I was like, "Oh, that makes sense because, like, the hosts and you would put the guests in the middle, I guess." Yeah. Yeah. You're rocking a fit today. I was going to say the yellow socks. Brr, brr, brr. Both got the, we both got the selvage. Yeah. I was looking at our jeans and I was like, "Very similar." Oh my God. That was the same jeans. I like the yellow socks with the docks. If you guys are just listening, he's wearing a cool outfit. Thank you. And I also have a smosh shirt on, which is the coolest part of the outfit. Yeah. That is so cool. I got the classic smosh tee. Yeah. I'm wearing a smosh bra. It's awesome. Oh, it's so cool. You know, we actually used to sell. Well, I want to say, I don't want to say "we," but back in it was just you and Anthony. Back in the defy days there on the site, they sold smosh panties. You guys are sickening. And I did not, I did not condone that. Condoned that? You didn't know it had peered. You're just sitting at your desk signing a proof. A proof. No, that was in the defy days. And yeah, there was, there was like smosh panties. And if I recall, there was like a heart above the word "smosh" or something. Was smosh written on the butt or the front? That's a good question. I do not remember. And you guys had nothing to do with the creative of it. It just appeared on the site. I don't remember because I feel like they used to sell like a ton of stuff that was just like slap a label on it and sell it. That's wild that they went past you and did that. I mean, maybe it was Anthony. I wish I had a pair. We can get you on. Okay. Nothing stopping us from doing that I guess. I wonder if eBay has one. Probably. Probably. That'd be sick. Probably says, "Shut up." That light is actually really funny. That would be on the butt because I fart. I've never farted in my life. I should get on the fart train. Imagine instead of a massage train, it's a fart train. Okay. So what's cool about today? Speaking of farts, what are we talking about today? Okay. Ian, we know how much you love boobies. You always- I thought you said boobies. Well, no, we're not bringing this up. Hey, you said that you don't bring up booby stuff, but you do bring up booby stuff. When did you guys have this conversation? I never said booby stuff. I said that I've never brought up- I've never brought up the breast milk thing. And every time- every time somebody's brought up breast milk has been against my will. Okay. Please. Again, another case, another case where I thought you just said boobies and you're like, "Oh, breast milk, Ian, breast milk." It's funny. I didn't actually say breast milk right here. Did you guys hear that? Yeah, but that's what you were inferring. No, no, because you're like, "Oh, the booby stuff, it's the booby stuff." Well, it's crazy as I didn't say breast milk, and I didn't say boobies. That's what you inferred. It just keeps happening with you, you know? I can't with you, Amanda. Okay. So anyways, we asked Ian because we know how much he loves boobies and randomly, he'll be like, "Oh, I watched this movie, you know, from the right country." You'll bring up a movie that I've never heard of before in my life. Okay. Like what? The like- Taking poem 1, 2, 3, the original. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I was sick. And then recently you were talking about some, was it an Italian or French film from like the. With the ship? With the ship? I don't know. Did you watch an old movie with the ship? That's like the battleship Potemkin? Sorry. Something like that. You watched a lot of like foreign, random foreign films that I never heard of. I think it's, yeah, I think it's important to have a good, because I watch so much media that I think it's good to have a good media diet. For sure. So I like to balance the crap with like something where I feel like, "Oh, I'm going to like take something away from this." Wow. That's really fun. See, I'm in a place where I'm like, "I don't want to watch crap." Oh? Do you know those some people are like, "Oh, I watched this thing on Netflix." It was so cheesy, but it was a joy. It was a fun. I can't do that. Oh, I love watching bad movies. Like I watched, there was a new Alan Richardson. Richson? Is that how you say it? Richson? Rich, Richson? He's doing what I do. Whatever. It's called War Machine. Nice. I wanted to watch that. Yeah, it's just like military propaganda, but with like an alien that just like kills people. Yeah. Yeah. He's a big guy. Yeah, he seems cool. Be the shit out of his neighbor. It's real life? Yeah, but he deserved it. Yeah, his neighbor was being an asshole. So you guys know his neighbor? He went, I'll reach her on him. Yeah. Out of everyone in the world. Rich sounds like so. I wish you'd pick a fight with every one of the world. It's like, I'm gonna pick a fight with that guy. The guy who's known for playing a guy on TV who just beats this shit. And he's massive. Yeah. Fun fact. I learned recently that I am in, that I've technically worked with Alan Richardson. I did an episode of Fred the show back in the day, back in like 2013. And I, and he is in the episode I'm in. It's an episode where Fred Figglehorn. I don't know this show. Oh, oh, you know what's funny? You don't know Fred. You guys are laughing. This episode of Fred the show that I've done, I think is the funniest episode of television I've ever been a part of. Why not know this show? It's legitimately it's because it ran for like 10 episodes on Nickelodeon and then got canceled, but it got three movies. I think the show might have been after the movies too. Really? It's really weird. The show is legitimately good. This is what's crazy. The show is legitimately really good, written by Alan Sorkin. Aaron Sorkin. No, in the episode, Fred drinks some expired milk and he starts hallucinating. And this evil, the expired cow shows up in his mirror and is like threatening him. And it's played by Alan Richardson. And I had no idea. He's not a cow. And he's like, I have to fight this cow. And I show up as a chocolate chip cookie who trains him in karate to fight this cow. And it's legitimately so fun. What? So the chocolate chip cookie would dunk into the milk, which is the cow's expired milk. No, I'm just a chocolate chip cookie who's training him in karate. Okay, no, there's no connection. It's crazy how I see this. It's legitimately funny because in the scenes with me, I'm in a giant cookie costume. And he'll be talking to me. But my over the shoulder shots, they just held up a real cookie next to the camera. That's so clever. That's so clever. It's a really funny episode. And it's a really funny show. Why didn't you ever meet the cow? Oh, I wasn't in any scenes with him. How? You're fighting. Oh, you're training. I'm training. I'm the Yoda. Okay, and get this. In the Fred movies, his dad, John Cena. Yes. I am one degree away from John Cena. I don't think John Cena was in that episode. So you're basically like John Cena. No, John Cena's dad. John Cena is in Fred the show. Did you meet John Cena? No, I just said I didn't meet Fred John Cena. You know what's crazy is I really want this story to end where you meet both of them. So just I haven't met either of them, but I have worked. So you didn't know scenes with them, but they were in the show. Yes. Well, because the show just loved to cast like huge buff guy. Yeah, it was good to say. Apparently. Yeah. They got the three. But they put you in a fat ass cookie. Hell yeah, I look good as hell. How do you do karate in a cookie? I wasn't doing karate. I was just training him in. Wow. I guess I don't understand. You really don't get the eyebrow nature of Fred the show. Wow. No, it's legitimately the funniest show. I would love to see a clip of that. And I look, I think so random and Goldberg's were really funny shows. Fred the show might be the funniest show I ever got to be. So why do you think it got canceled? Just nobody was watching it. That's why I got canceled. Okay. Yeah. But it was legitimately funny. And I think unfortunately at that point, because Fred was he was like the first big YouTuber like first like most his name. The channel was called Fred. What's his full name? Fred was the character. Oh god. Okay. The actor who plays him is named Luke. Do you think that he still does? He doesn't still do Fred. And he does. I mean, he doesn't want to talk about it. He doesn't want to talk about it. Well, because it was it was such a big sensation back in the day. Well, yeah, because it was just like. That's when I'm in the past. He's trying to put it in the past. Cause his he was like a very like everyone like anyone that wasn't a fan of Fred really hated Fred. Yeah. Because he had this he pitched up his voice in editing. And he was like really hyper. And so just like anyone that wasn't like a kid that wasn't a fan of Fred was like, I hate Fred Fred sucks. So he's one of the first YouTubers to go to like the mainstream. Yeah. Nickelodeon was like, we'll give you some movies. We'll do a show. And so people thought the show it's like, Oh, it's Fred the show. It's probably and I remember at the time before I worked on it, thinking like Fred the show. Oh my god. And then I got the script and I was laughing my ass off. And I did it. I was like, this is really funny. And they kind of like they kind of unpaste his voice for the show. Yeah. It wasn't as intense. The show is on. Do you think people didn't watch it because they were annoyed by his voice? I think they didn't watch it because the connotation of the character already. And I think Fred by that point, it already kind of been because this is like, we're getting a little worn out on this. This is like 2012, 2013. And Fred was at his peak in like 2007, 2008. Yeah, probably 2009 maybe. Yeah. So it's just a few years after. Anyways, anyways, we're talking about movies. Wow. So anyways, we're talking about movies. I really appreciate that lore. Yeah. Why we brought you on in is because you actually have a letter boxed. - I do. - You write movie reviews. - Yeah. - Are you bringing any movie reviews today of your own? - Uh oh. - You were okay. - Secret. - Before we started filming, you were typing ferociously on your phone. - Yeah. - Cool, 'cause I remember, I watched Mad Max Fury Road last night. - Oh, so good. - That movie's perfect. - So good. I remember seeing that in the theaters at the vista before it closed down and then reopened. It was epic. - That movie is perfect. - It's perfect. - Truly. - Perfect. - It's one of my five-star reviews. - You know, Tom Hardy barely speaks in that movie and yet he's so impactful. He's so good in it. - I think he speaks more grunts than actual words. - It's incredible. - Yeah. - Are you willing for us to go like, delve into your letterbox today? - Of course. - Yeah. - What are your like top movies? - My top four. - My top four. - Perfect. - Yeah, what are your top four? - Or like top four your favorite. But then also what are movies that you think are perfect? - Oh, okay. I think those are two different categories. - That's a great question. What are movies that you think are perfect? How about that? - 'Cause yeah, there's movies that are your favorites. - Right. - And then there's movies that are your favorite. - You're perfect that you like. - Do I ever need to rewatch? - I do think Raiders of the Lost Ark is a perfect movie. - Wow. - It's also one of my favorites. But I'm like, I think it is structurally as a story and filmmaking just the way it's shot is just like perfect. - Mm. - I do agree. I think Arrival is like. - Arrivals. - Arrivals. - Yeah, Arrival is one of my favorites. - With my favorites. - With my favorites, I don't think there's any movie that's perfect. - Sure, sure. - But I would say on a relative scale. - I mean, look, I gotta give it to RRR. I don't think it's perfect. - Yeah, but that movie rocks. - What's crazy? - Definitely not perfect in the way of like, I don't know, female representation. - Do you have any reviews from RRR that you picked out from you? 'Cause I actually have some. - Oh. - Selena actually picked out some reviews from RRR. - Okay. - I don't know what RRR is about. It's a fictional history of two legendary revolutionaries, journey away from home before they began fighting for their country in the 1920s. - Yeah. - And also a lot of dancing and animals. - It's not a lot of dancing. - Oh, but the dancing. - Yeah, dancing is like a huge part of it for me. - Competitive fighting dancing. Oh yeah, for sure. - Some excellent mustaches also. - Oh, the mustaches are, - And just like some of the worst dialogue for all of the English speakers, which I think makes the movie better, because it just adds this layer of comedy that's like kind of unintentional, where it's like, they come into a scene and then the British people are like, and that's that. - Okay, here's a review. The timeline of my experience with RRR, zero through 20 minutes. Why are people obsessed with this movie? It's so over the top, what is even happening? 21 through 80 minutes. Okay, I get this. It's growing on me. This is cool. 81 plus minutes. Fuck yes, iconic. Hit me with all of it. - Yep. - Another review. Now, excuse me, I have some dance moves to learn. - Yeah. - Another one contains the best piggyback ride action sequence in somatic history. - Oh, oh, yeah. - Life will forever be divided into two parts before RRR and after RRR. This movie was great. Last one. No movie has earned. The title card doesn't appear until 40 minutes into the movie more than RRR. Eat your heart out, drive my car. - It also appears three times throughout the movie. - I love it. - It's kind of like the, 'cause split into three acts kind of thing. - Yeah, I love it. - No, that movie's incredible. - It is such a fun movie. - It is like a rough first 10 minutes where you're like, what's going on? And then they just busted this lady's head with a stick. - Yeah. - And you're like, huh? - Yeah, that was, that was hard. Also, it was like very intense to watch. You know when you're watching like a 3D movie and you're like, what is reality? That's what it felt like when I first started it. - You also have to like get used to like the physics and the world where it's just like, these people are superhuman. - Yes. - And you just have to accept that. - Yeah. - It's so good. - Okay, so RRR, you think is a perfect movie? - I don't know if it's a perfect movie, but it's one of my favorite movies. - It's your top four. - Okay, so my top four, my top four are. - Arrivals. - City of God. - Yeah. - City of God is so good. - I haven't watched that. - You know what's funny? I watched that movie when I was like 12 and I haven't seen it since, but I remember watching and just be like, this is crazy, but I need to rewatch it now as an adult so I can actually understand what's going on. - Yeah. - But my brother showed it to me when I was a kid. He's like, this is one of the best movies ever made. - Right. - I was just like, oh, this is just scary. I feel like, man, Brazil went through some crazy shit in like the 70s because, you know, City of God is based around that time. So is, I'm still here. - I'm still here. - It is like crazy. And then also, the secret agent which came out last year. - I need to see it. - I've seen anything. - Is it really good? - It's good. It's a little confusing. - Yeah. - But I think that's kind of the point because I think that time in Brazil was very confusing and weird. But yeah, City of God is just incredible. I have our RR on here. I have, they came together. - Yeah. - In my top four. That's Paul Rudd and Amy Polar just making fun of rom-coms. It's like the naked gun of rom-coms. - Oh, I don't know if I saw it. - So it's the same people that made White Hot American Summer. - Yep. - It's like, it's one of those jokes per second movies. - Got it. - Just non-stop jokes. And then the other one on my top four. Portrait of a lady on fire. - I just recently watched that again. And the most amazing thing about that movie is every shot is a painting. The way they light, everything is unbelievable. The way they have a scene where it looks like they're lit from candles, I was sitting there being like, how did they do? And they're barely speaking in it. - I feel like you'd like Train Dreams. - That's on my list. I need to watch, I need to watch Train Dreams. One of my favorite movies that is not in English is Vulver. It's one of my all-time favorites. - Oh, I got that on my list. It's Pedro Montever who's one of my favorite directors. I love him. Broken Embraces is also such a weird, good movie by him. But Vulver is one of my absolute favorites. It's like about sisterhood and mother and it's just gorgeous. I love the way he shoots. He's very, he's also very sexual and sensual the way he shoots. - Porto, what's Penelope Cruz? - Yeah, it's Penelope Cruz. But everyone in it, it's just, and that movie goes places where you're like, "Oh, what's happening here?" - Yeah, Amadeus. - Amadeus is so good. - I've still never seen Amadeus. - So good. - It's so good. - It's 12 hours long. - No, it's not that long, it's only. - Do you do it? - No, it's only 160 minutes. - Okay. - Do you know what I think is a perfect movie? - It's all you think is a perfect movie. - The Bird Cage. - Okay. - Now if you're original, I haven't seen the original, the original is like a French movie. - Oh, but the Robin Williams. - The Robin Williams one is so unbelievable. - That's one of the more recent movies I've seen. I'd never watched the Bird Cage. I didn't really know what it was about. And then Courtney and I watched it one weekend and that movie rocks. That movie's so funny. I think I was reading that Nathan Lane wasn't originally supposed to play the role he was in. This might be wrong, but I thought I was reading that. It was like, "Oh, Steve Martin was originally supposed to be in that role." But I can't imagine that movie without Nathan Lane. - Has to be, Nathan Lane. - Nathan Lane is the reason that movie was. - Has to be. - And I love that Robin Williams played it the way he played it. It's one of his, honestly, most like one of his more like downplayed performances. - Yeah. - Like more along with goodwill hunting or something. He's not playing it big and it works so well that movie's so good. - Goodwill hunting is also an amazing movie. - Yeah. You got good picks, man. - You give us your top fours? - I mean, I give you more than I do. I have a rival up there. I got Dune 2. - Dune 2. - Do you like Dune 2 more than Dune? - Yeah. - Yeah, I thought I liked it. - I think Dune 2, I think Dune, the first Dune was like, the pacing was just kind of slow. - Yeah. - Yeah, right. - Still incredible, but I am just so curious what the next Dune is. 'Cause do you know anything about Dune lore? - Yes. - Whoa. - Sorry, I love Dune. - I mean, I really, I love Dune. - I've read a little bit about it. I'm saying about like, yeah, about how the timeline is just Duncan Idaho's all the way down. They start cloning him like a million times over. - Yeah, no, 'cause they go like, is that correct? - It is, there's a million Duncan Idaho's. And then there's a worm emperor. - Yes. - Like there's a guy who's a worm. - Yeah, I heard that. - The thing is, what's funny is I'm thinking about when I watched The Original, which I felt like I was actually tripping on acid when I watched The Original, I was like, and the worm is so, what's his name? The guy who plays Stellen's card, Stellen's card, Stellen's card. - Oh, you're a barren harkening. - Just all of the creatures in the original and that movie feels like it's three and a half hours long. - Yeah, I think it is. - But I just think that it goes to such a weird fucking place. - Yeah, 'cause in the books. - But I've never read the books. - Yeah, so in the books, after Paul Traiti's, there's a, I'm sorry, spoilers, but like the movies are not gonna get-- - I don't know. - No, 'cause this is like book five. There's a, I think his son becomes like an immortal worm emperor who rules the universe. There's apparently a dominatrix planet. - Okay, dominatrix is who are a thing, and there's just a bunch of weird things. - Because Paul Traiti's is like a false-- - He's a false prophet. - He's a false prophet. So in the last Dune II, there, you have the Florence Pew situation, he's like set up to be with her. - I don't, I'm trying to remember. I need to rewatch Dune II. - Dune II, well. If you have, you know, three hours, what do you just said remind me of? And this is so weird that my brain went here. But just thinking of like the score and the music, "Sacario" is also such a good movie. - Oh, yeah, the movie message. - The score of "Sacario." Before Taylor Sheridan just started writing content for-- - We're gonna come for you if you bring up "Taylor Sheridan." - Yeah. - Yeah. You know what's crazy? I was on vacation and I met this woman whose son is in the new "Taylor Sheridan." - Oh, good for him. - I don't know much about "Taylor Sheridan." I've only seen her. - Yellowstone, 19. - He had a great-- - Yellowstone. - No, dude, dude. - He created Yellowstone. - No, oh, shit. - You will shit if you look at what this guy's done. - Also, he was a cop in "Sons of Anarchy." - So-- - He was a cop in "Sons of Anarchy." - Oh, snap. - That's where he got, yeah. - But he wrote, he wrote "Heller High Water," which is incredible. - Yes, it's such a good movie. - He wrote "Win River," sorry, "Rote Directed." - Such sad. - "Win River," which is sad. - It'll be so good though. - He did "Sacario." He wrote "Sacario." - And then-- - He did all the iterations of it. - He did 1926, whatever the other-- - Oh, so then he started making money. - And now he did the new show, "Madison." - So he does every-- - Everything. - He does the shows that everybody's mom is like, "Have you watched Yellowstone?" - Yeah, of course. - But it's my favorite show. - It's my favorite show. - It's brutal. - I feel like he really struck gold with this kind of like white man power fantasy kind of thing of like, I want to live out on a ring. The hierarchy of the older man taking on generation at generation. - Yeah, yeah. - And he struck gold. So yeah, he did like-- - But again, he did really amazing things. "Heller Highwater," "Sacario." - "Win River." - "Win River." - Yeah. - There's a scene in "Sacario" that plays my head every now and then you know the scene. That's the dinner table. I think that'll-- - At the end? - At the end? - Yeah. - Yeah. - With Benicio Tadoro. - I mean, that whole movie's great. - The movie's so good. - It's also-- you're watching it. Like, I felt like I was Emily Blunt watching at the whole time, just like, so out of my elements, so fish out of water like, well, I shouldn't be here. - Right. - That's what I felt like. - And yeah, she's like the avatar for that. - Exactly. - That's not really her story. - No, it's not. Is it Benicio's story? - How often do you watch movies? - I won't say like, every day. - I go, he watches all the time. - But I've seen-- - Truly all the time. - So far, I've seen 53 this year. - Wow. I will say, my normal is that, but since having a kid, it's really hard to watch a movie. But I'm actually finding my-- I've been really into shows when I'm finding my joy for it, but I was like, movie person. I watched everything that was out. Everything that, like, everyone was talking about the indie films. It's hard to watch movies right now, but I miss so badly going to the movie theaters and, but God, I love movies. I also love international movies so much. - Yeah. - What's your favorite international movie? - Well, there. - Oh, there you go. What were you writing a review of? Well, you're saying-- - Oh, yeah. I was-- - You were aggressively typing. - Well, that's-- I was writing a new review of my feelings on Mad Max for your road. - Oh, right, right. - Oh, did you have your feelings changed? - My feelings haven't changed. I feel like the-- Some of the VFX have aged a little bit, where I'm like-- - Some of the explosions, some of the-- - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - And also the 3D thing, where the steering wheel comes out of that. - That was corny as hell from the get-go. - Yeah. - Like, I kind of like-- - I forgot that that movie came out in 3D. - Oh, yeah. - And when Mad Max for your road came out, like, the concept of a "Dine in Theater" was still kind of like novel. And we went to this "Dine in Theater," and we were all watching on 3D. And then that part happens, where like, the guitar comes out at the screen, and everyone was just like, "Ah!" Like, it's just such a-- It's such a great movie that happens right towards the end, and you're like, "It's great, I never could do the 3D thing." The only movie that I didn't mind in 3D was the original avatar for some reason. - I will say, dude, Dread. - Oh, you're talking about it. - I would say, like, on level with Mad Max, I feel like Dread, that came out in 3D, and that actually had some pretty good 3D effects. It was also kind of secretly directed by Alex Garland, who did "X Machina" and so on. - Yeah, it's Machina. - No, that movie's really good. I finally watched it at one point. - Dude, that movie "Fuckin' Dread" rocks. - I have not seen Dread. - It's Carl Urban, who he's in a mask, he's in a mask the entire time, which I think is like, that's something that movies always, they always like, chicken out, and have like the star take their helmet off, or take their mask off, to be like-- - He stays in it the whole time. - He stays in it the whole time. All you see is his mouth. - He's like thick Australian accent. He doesn't really know, he's New Zealand, I don't know. - I don't know what he is, but he, you see his, you, all you see is his mouth, and he just has this like, this like, grimace. - He's so bad at it. - He's so bad at it. - And he's like, he's incredible. - He's so good in that movie. - Is he done with the boys? Is the boys done? - I think it's done. - It's the final season. - Thank God. (laughs) - I loved the boys for the first two seasons. - Same. - Then I was like, I meet this past time. - I've been watching it, and I was, I just don't like all the gore. - Yeah, it gets over the top. - This is my take on the boys this season was, there was an era like Game of Thrones came out and Breaking Bad, where it was like, new to have things go wrong, and for the villains to win. And it was like, whoa, what is this? This is crazy. - Yeah. - But now watching the boys, I've been able to predict every scene, 'cause I go, okay, this is gonna go wrong. All right, this plan's gonna fail. All right, the worst thing that could possibly happen is gonna happen, and it does without fail, to the point that I'm actually bored. I'm like, I am no longer surprised by this. Like, you need to have different things happen. It's funny, like, we got so into that, that now, when shows have a good thing happen, that's what I'm surprised. Yeah, I'm like, whoa, a good thing happened. - And I like that. I like it. - Like Paddington. - I like it. - Yeah. - It's a perfect movie. Okay, Paddington too. - Still haven't seen it. I know. - I know. Everyone says that. I watched Paddington, and I still have yet to watch Paddington too. - Everyone talks about it. - He goes to prison. - Paddington three is fine. It's lovely. It's got Olivia Coleman, she's great. - Speaking of Olivia Coleman, the favorite is one of my fucking favorite movies. - Oh, The Yorgos movie? - I loved it. - Yeah, it's good. - I loved it. Would I rewatch it? Maybe once more, that's it. - I feel like that's most like, most Yorgos length and most movies. You're like, that was good. I don't want to see that in. - I cannot rewatch it. Yeah, poor things. I also love poor things. - Sure. - Will not be. - Oh, yeah, zero inches in rewind. - But I was laughing so hard at poor things. - Very darkly funny. - I thought Mark Ruffalo's character was one of my favorite characters I've seen in so long. I think when he stopped, there was this interview about him when he stopped doing the Hulk, he felt free. Because I think you're on a really serious contract with obviously Marvel, and so he felt free. So I felt like he was just like, I am gonna have the most fun in this wild character. He was, I just, his character made me laugh out loud. And I don't know, I don't know if it's like doing comedy all the time. I really struggled to laugh out loud in movies, which sounds so sad to me. - No, I. - But that's just surprised me. And I felt like he was joy the whole time. - Yeah. - And I also feel like, I know that Ted Lasso was really funny because it was joy, but like, I really feel this shift in comedy, where instead of like, this woman's life, everything's going wrong and how terrible, I feel this shift of like joy and it can be dark joy, but like this joy, it can be like hysterical joy or excited joy or scary joy, but that's like the way comedy's going right now. And I'm really into it. - Yeah, no, 'cause like, I think similar with comedy, you know, I remember when like, girls came out. And I remember at the time being like, I love this and you know, that was like when like, Herbie Enthusiasm was on like, where it's like, oh, these despicable characters. All these people are cringy and hard to watch, and it's funny because these characters are awful. But now, like, I love when I have a character I can root for. Like, it's really fun. And I love the kind of like, thing you're seeing with a lot of characters, which is the kind of character who's oblivious and naive, and they're so positive and so close. - They're so earnest. - And I love that earnesty. It's what I loved about like watching the Bird Cage. I was just like, there's a lot of earnesty in it. A lot of the scenes that are really funny is where it's just like genuine kindness coming from these characters. - And even if they are villain, my favorite part is, even if they are the bad guy that we can't stand, they have this like, really awesome redemption arc, where it's like, oh, you're fighting for something that you believe is right, but we all know it's not right, but you don't know it yet, until you lose something or somebody that you love kind of points it out. And then you have to go through this journey of like, self redemption. And that's where I also find joy in that. - Totally. - Like the show, DTF St. Louis, that we both love. There's all these characters that you're like, villain, villain, are you the villain? And then you're like, oh, oh, oh, you guys are just so in your own bubble, and the best character ever, as someone is not aware of how they're making people feel. They know they're hurting this person's feelings, but they don't understand why. That's my favorite, is them like. - I almost, I feel like another like hot take throughout there. - Hot take, honey. - I almost feel like because so much American shows and just movies for the past like, decade have been so like, everyone's awful. Everyone has bad intentions. Everything ends up going wrong. I almost wonder if that sphere allowed for anime to become as mainstream and big, because in anime, like people are like, we're gonna work hard and we succeed. Like, there's a lot of like, the good guy wins. And there's kind of like, that's like a very like, typical storyline in a lot of, not all anime's, plenty, and like Death Note has like a lot of dark endings. But so many are just have like a, oh, if you work hard and you believe in yourself, we will persevere in win. And that's like refreshing. - I think that's also connected to like the, honestly, the Romantic era that's coming back so hard is people are like Romantic sci-fi. It's the main story and everything, which is just like, obviously the hero's journey. - You know, it's kind of interesting that like, Romantic's become like so huge, but there aren't any like big Romantic movies that have come out. - I don't think, well, it's all a part of it. - Well, they're trying, it's hard, they're trying. - Well, Michael B. Jordan bought Fourth Wing the series, which was like, such an, I have a lot of thoughts on that series, but he bought that series to make. I think it's really hard to make them into-- - But like the Sarah, like the Sarah J. Mass, like-- - She took it back. So she, all of her rights were sold to Hulu, and then she just took all of her rights back. - 'Cause like, I guess it's probably too horny, 'cause at that point it would be like, it would be like softcore porn, be it? - I think it's visual. I genuinely think that the author and the person are colliding on who is going to be cast, because in these books, they're God-like, beautiful creatures, no one on earth looks like that. - What do you think nobody's hot enough? - Nobody's hot, but also, yes. - I do think there's some that. - I think they're probably hard to translate over to movie and TV shows. - They could get cringy, cheesy, real fast. - Yeah, like some things, truly, just the medium that they're made in is where they work best, right? And I think also with books, like Romantasy, it's where people really want to place themselves in it. And when a movie, you literally can't do that. You're watching it. - So funny, I don't ever, I ask myself this the other day when I'm reading those, I never put myself in their shoes. It's always like, I'm watching them from afar, like a little creep. - Yeah. - You know what I'm saying? - You know what's weird? Like, when I'm reading it, I'm a huge pervert. - I'm in the room, just like-- - I'm in the corner, it's like this. - I have this feeling that like, pretty much every sex scene in a movie is like, not erotic at all. - I don't think that it's erotic at all when they're shooting it. - But I mean, like-- - Oh, wait, what do you mean? - They're like the final, you're saying like, as a viewer and watching it. And I see a sex scene. I'm like, it never, like, I feel like it never achieves like what it's trying to achieve. - Really? - Except. - Those aren't good sex scenes. - There's only one sex scene that you think is, does the job. - Yeah. - What is it? - All right. You ever seen the, you're not gonna guess. - This set up is, I can't even handle this at all. - Have you ever seen the, the, who else is in it? The, if you don't, Jude Law. - Get to it. - World War II sniper movie. - Oh, so-- - Enemy at the gate. - I've never seen Enemy at the gate. - With what's her name, Rachel? - Rachel Bice. - Oh, what? - So when you feel the rumor like, - Yes! - And they're like, yeah. - Enemy at the gates also, that scene is so hot. Also, I'm sorry, cold mountain. It's such a sad, long movie, but Jude Law and Cold Mountain and the Cold Kidman's relationship is very-- - Maybe it's just Jude Law. - So maybe it must be Jude Law, but there's something, like, I think, I think because like-- - Enemy at the gates is very good. - Because like, I feel like with sex scenes in movies, they're always like, oh yeah, we're gonna like show some titties or whatever. - No. - In Enemy at the gates, they don't show anything. - So anything, they're laying next to each other. Aren't they in like a camp with a bunch of people? - Yeah, they're like, yeah. - There's like a bunch of people sleeping next to them, and they're like getting busy under the sheets. - And it's very erotic. - Whoa. - Yeah, okay. - I agree with you. I think it's the intention behind it, the scene. I think some movies go way too hard and you're like, oh, those are two actors who worked out really, really hard for this scene and, you know, they stopped and go and they don't have a lot of chemistry. - And it's just awkward and like. - I do think there are some sexier scenes that I will have to ruminate on the rest of the set, 'cause I can't quite think of them. - Yeah, come back around to it. - But I will say Rachel, her, she is like sexy as hell. I don't think that's her last name. - Advice, yeah. Rachel, vice. Rachel, vice. - Oh, with a W, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, that scene's pretty hot. (all laughing) - Anyway, I don't know what we're there, but. - No, that's good. - So do we want to read some of your letterbox reviews? - I don't have a game, I don't have a good one. - I have good ones. - You do serious ones. - Well, 'cause I feel like, I feel like the, I don't want to be that annoying person on letterbox that just makes like one sentence jokes all the time. - Okay. - Like occasionally I'll do like a joke, but then I also think like being earnest about my love or hate for a movie is good. I think it's good to provide an actual like opinion and feeling on things, so. - Also Phantom Thread, I know a lot, not a lot of people loved that movie, but I loved that movie. - You're crazy. - You have some letterbox reviews too, but Shane, you have something you said you have a game. - Well, I was gonna pick, you know, they have like a bunch of the most popular rated movies on letterbox. I was gonna pick a movie and I was gonna read a review and then give you guys a chance to guess. - Yes, that's great. - That's great. - Let's do it. - Love it. - I'm gonna pick a random movie and it's a movie that you guys definitely both know. It's gonna be like, how did that mouse learn how to drive that car? - Sure. - Let's do it a little. - You know what, Shane, I have to say something, you're really good at games. - Yeah. - You should've like created game. I'm sorry, I'm being real right now. - I created a game, it's called Sniper Chess. - No. - No, but like, you're really, really good at like, I'm like, oh, that's such a good idea that I would never think of. - Wow. - So welcome. - We also used to do a show similar to this called Netflix and Chill. - Don't tell me that, just let me sit in that. - Where we would read reviews of Netflix movies and if you guessed it wrong, you'd have ice poured down your pants. - Yep. - This is back when you. - I'm wearing this rash though, try it. - No, it would go up then. - Oh my God. - All right. - Shut up. - Here's the first review of this movie. Very popular, very well known movie. - Okay. - "Gayobon gave it four stars," said. - It's probably Shavon, but that's okay. - Yeah, probably Shavon. - Shavon. - It's okay. Hey, hey, hey. - Hey, you know what? - You don't want to forget this game. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Hey, Jane, hey, come on back, come on back. Come on back. - No, I don't want to play. Okay, okay. - "Gayobon gave it four stars." They said, "Fellas, is it gay to be in love with your imaginary friend?" (gasps) - Oh. - Is it gay to be in love? - "Fellas?" - He said, "Fellas is gay." - So it's a hot band, it's a hot, male imaginary friend. The only imaginary friend. - Oh, inside out. - No. - No. - You're crazy. That was an insane. - "Holly gave it five stars," said, "Bitches be so fine then boom, they're a figment of your imagination." Oh, "Black Swan." - Oh, "Casper." - Nope. - "Shit." - All right. - Oh, what am I saying? - This one's probably gonna give it away. I think Ian, you'll get it with this one. - Sure. - "Junior gave it five stars," said, "They could use that soap and take a fucking shower." Fight club? - It's fight club. - Oh. - Oh. - Oh my god, I forgot. - There you go. - Big minute of imagination. - Yeah. - Okay. - His Brad Pitt is really hot. - He is so hot in that movie. - Right. - Yeah. - All right. I can pick another one. - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. - This is fun. - Yeah, yeah. - I'm feeling fun. - All right. I'm truly just thinking like the top movies on Xbox. All right. Here we go. James gave this movie five stars. - Okay, James. - And he said, "The most fun and light-hearted horror movie ever made." - Parasite? - No. - This is barbarian. The most not fun and light-hearted. - Adam Bolt gave this movie four and a half stars. He said, "Worryed for the guy taking the longest bath of all time." Salt Bird. - I'm kidding. - What? - All right. I can wait. - Wait, the longest bath of all time. - I don't know a guy taking the longest bath in a horror movie. - All right, here we go. - Okay. - Said woman. - Warren gave this three and a half stars. He's, they wrote, "Did they ever record him jerking off?" Barried. - No, I'm scared. - No. - Wait, 127 hours? - No. - Jesus, what are you saying? No, he never, he's stuck in a cliff. He's not taking a bath or jerking off. - Well, maybe if, was it his arm that got stuck or was it his leg? - Franko, baby. - God, that movie. - Can you read it one more? - One more. - Give us one more. - Jackson gave it four and a half stars, said, "It must suck for all the people in like Asia, "always seeing him sleeping when it's on." - Truman Show. - You got it. - It is the Truman Show. - Truman Show. - They ever record him jerking off. (laughing) - That's true. - Law is bath. Why don't they house you? - I forget. One of my favorite movies ever. - Yeah, that is such a good movie. - That is an old-timer for sure. - Yeah. - Okay, another one. - You want to keep going? - Yeah. - Why does it keep doing this? - Yeah. - It's fun because people love to make shitty jokes. - I do have more movie reviews, but let's keep going. Maybe I'll do one in ten. - This is the first one you're not going to get, but you can try to see if you can get lucky. Four and a half stars from V. They write, "What's up, guys? "I'm fucking crying." Okay, so it's a sad movie. - Or it's a comedy. Okay, keep going. Valor gave it to you. Four and a half stars said, "A movie about a man who runs and enjoys cutting grass." -Forest gum? -Forest gum. -Damn. -Nice. -Nice. -Where did it go? -It's really good. It has so many points that I just get. -None. You get no points. -Wow! You get nothing. Oh, what's that? What's that from? -I get nothing. I have no idea. -Willie Wonka. -You get nothing. You drank fizzy lifting drinks. -Let's see if you guys can get this on the first guest. -Okay. Sam gave this movie five stars. He said, "So, this is why teachers make you take your hat off in school." -Final destination? -Redditary? -It is not a redditary. -Okay. River gave this five stars and said, "When I say I love French cinema, this is what I mean." -Um. I have a school. -Blue is the warmest color. -French cinema. It's not AMA. -Um. I don't know. French cinema. -Uh. -Uh. -What the hell? -Are you.? -Alexine is bouncing back there. -What? Read that. -All right. Let's see it. -I'm trying to find one that doesn't spoil it. -Okay. Frey gave this five stars. It said, "Can't believe they invented the entire country of France for this movie." -Oh, no. Oh, no. -You guys know it. -This is what. What is happening? -And it's the most French thing, so. -Redditary? -It's Ratatouille! -Oh! -No! -What was the second thing again? -This is why it was French cinema. -Oh, hat off in school. -It's why you have to take your hat off in school. -I don't like Ratatouille. -I don't want to rat cooking my food. We talked about this. -Oh! -Scarry rats. -Okay, yeah. You think you had a hard time with that movie. -It's not real, Amanda. -Yes, it is. -It's not. It's an animation. -Uh. -Never happened. -Fiesel goes west. That was real. -Fival? -Fival. -Okay, I've got a good one. I got another one. And here's a movie that I think is actually perfect. -Oh! -This is, I think, a perfect movie. -Okay. -Someone said, "Patrick gave it four-and-a-half stars." They said, "The second best die-hard movie." -So, it's not die-hard. -Of course. -James gave it three-and-a-half stars, said, "Young Patrick Bateman." -Wait! Christian Bale. -Wait. -Perfect movie? -Jonathan Fuji gave it four-and-a-half stars, said, "Tom and Jerry asked movie." -Oh. -It's not. It's not the fighter. -It's unknown. -No! -Wait until you find out what this movie is. -It's not Christian Bale. It's not Christian Bale. They're just saying that he's like a. -Like a young Patrick Bateman. -Young Patrick Bateman, fine. -So, he's crazy, very attractive man. -Tom and Jerry asked movie. It's like a die-hard. -What the hell? -All right, I'm gonna give you one that's gonna give it away, but. -Sorry. -Wait, someone. This makes me want to rewatch the movie. Hannah gave it five-star and said, "They say six-seven, about six or seven times in this movie." Okay, Benjamin gave it four-and-a-half stars and said, "I'm a full-grown ass man, and that furnace is still terrifying." -Oh, I'm alone. -It's home alone. -Oh! -Young Patrick Bateman? -No Patrick Bateman. -Who is young Patrick Bateman? -Kevin! -Kevin is a young Patrick Bateman. -What? -I don't agree with this. -I don't agree with that. -This is why you should. -He's got this morning routine. He's doing all sorts of stuff. -But he's not a killer. -He's a kid. -He basically kills them. -No, no, no, you're right, you're right, you're right. -I see it. -Yeah, I see it. -Okay. -All right. I'm gonna pick this one might be a little bit harder. -Okay. -Okay. -I'm having so much fun. -I can tell. -I love just reading this. -This is fun. -You like having control and power. -Muriel gave it five-stars, getting killed because you're not a crazy cinephile. -No idea. -Muriel? -I think a lot of people probably guessed it. -What are you saying? -Really? Okay, hold on. -Muriel's just the person who wrote it. -No, I know, but I have a deep connection. -Tanna gave it four-and-a-half-stars, said, "One, don't pick up the phone." -Oh, scream. -Scream. -How are you guys so-- how are you so good? -I'm so-- I watch more movies than you, clearly. I'm like, I am the movie person, not you. That's so wild. -That's this sucks. Don't worry about it. -All right, here we go. -But that beginning scene of scream is a classic for almost every movie. Actually, when a stranger calls is like the classic, have you ever seen that? -Where it's like, they're in that house. -It's a jody foster. -Okay, I found the same reviewer for this, this is a new movie. -Okay. -Muriel gave this movie five-stars. -Muriel, stop it. -They said, didn't mean to moan like that. My bad. A lot of these people are just like reviewers on Adam Bolt, who gave a review on a different thing. Four-and-a-half-stars, or as we Australians call it, Tuesday. -Something with Chris Ham's worth? -Aaron gave this five-stars, said, as Charlie XCX once said, "Beep, beep, so let's ride." -Okay. -Fast and furious. -No. -Mowning. -Didn't mean to moan like that. It's something hot. Or not. -David gave it five-stars, said, "I would drive one of the spiky cars." Okay, it says Mad Max. -Fear your own. -Bad Max. -Fear your own. -All right. -So they didn't mean to moan about. -They're just like it's hot. It's a hot movie. -What? It's super hot. What are you. -Oh, wow. -This is crazy. -Okay. -I love the top review on this one. -All right. Carly gave this movie four-and-a-half stars. And they said, "Where the fuck is the breakfast?" Breakfast is a Tiffany's. -It's not breakfast. -Good guess, though. -That's a great guess, but you didn't. -Damn. -Got it. -Trav gave it four stars. They said, "Me and my five personalities at 3am." -Oh, oh, oh. The one with James McAvoy? Split? -Where the fuck is the breakfast? -I don't know. -Soup George gave it two-and-a-half stars, said they didn't even eat breakfast. -What the hell? -What the hell? -Why are you talking about breakfast? -I don't know. -Oh, wait. Someone said Andrea gave it three stars in all capsules. -If you say something about breakfast again. -No, they just said that fucking victorious episode, crying emoji. -Victorious episode? -Yeah, you guys are probably not getting home in that. -Oh, no. -Oh, god. -Did you give it even breakfast? Is this a popular game? -James James wrote two stars. I can't believe I watched Victoria's version before this. -Oh, is it Shinler's List? -No, what?! -I said that you're crazy. -Wait, is this a popular movie? -It's a very famous movie. Incredibly famous movie. -Princess Bride. -It's not Princess Bride. -Stop. -Stop. -Keep playing. -Andy gave it five stars, said the only movie where a guy called Bender is the coolest dude on the planet. -Bender. -Bender. -This one version just has a heart for their name. Four stars. They should have just started a band and called themselves Lemonade Mouth to me. -What? -Lenade Mouth. -Lenade Mouth. -The connection between this movie and just fucking Disney and Nickelodeon. -This is victorious? -Bender. -They're so lost. -Molly gave it four stars, said the victorious parody of this is Bender. -Stop. -The life of the victorious. -Okay, okay, is it right? -Let's go move away from victorious. -Every television show has been broadcast. -We're getting really bad. -Vivian gave this movie four stars and said when you're circle small, but y'all crazy. -Okay, all right. -Okay, so it's a- -It's a par- -Paracus gave four stars and said dumbass makeover took a star off. -Makeover? -There's a makeover in this movie. -This is downfire? -Not this is downfire. It's like a group of friends. -It's a group of- -It's a group of people becoming friends. -What? -This is awful. -Becoming friends. -The group of people become friends. -The others? -It's not how they're getting close. -They're getting fairly close. -A breakfast club. -It is breakfast club. -It didn't even eat breakfast. -Victorious? -Victorious did an episode, a parody episode of- -That makes sense. -Who's Bender? -I forget Bender. -Was he like the reject guy? -Rakfast club. They acted. -They didn't even eat breakfast. -They didn't actually even eat ham. -Why did I think that? -I'm thinking way too specific. -I'm going to go with a really- There's a movie that you both love. -Okay. -I think you might have even mentioned it in this episode. -Oh my god. -I love this movie. It's a really cool movie. She gave this movie four stars and they wrote, "She fucking looks like Willy Wonka." -Arrival. -It's not Willy Wonka. -Who looks like Willy Wonka and Arrival? -Lucy gave this movie five stars and said "The movie equivalent of being hugged." -Pattington? -Not pattington. -No, it's not my favorite. I've never seen it. You're crazy. -She looks like Willy Wonka? -Number one Gizmo fan gave it five stars and said, "When will anyone love me like that?" -Oh. -Karsten gave it three and a half stars, said, "She's so crazy." -Oh, her editor. -Oh, her editor. -It's of course. -Her editor. -No. I hate that movie. Stop it. Wait, she's so crazy. -Some of these reviews I don't understand. -What is the mention? That's what I'm struggling with. -Hold on. Hold on. -Almely. -You got it. -Oh. -Her hair. -How dare they? -How dare they? -How dare they? -That movie is so good. -It's one of my favorites. -It's so good. -Yeah. -Yeah. - How dare they? - How dare they? - Wait, I have one. - Oh, okay. - Okay, Selena's gonna shout out some reviews and then we're gonna guess. - Okay, Viking gave the snow stars but liked it. I thought this was about magicians. - The prestige. - I was just gonna say that. - No, but that is about magicians. - Yeah. - Yeah. - It's about magicians. - Magic Mike. - Yeah. - Nice. - Nice. - It is about magicians. - Oh shit. - They're magicians. They're getting me. - Yeah, how did you get those abs, you know? - You probably worked out pretty hard and he also dances and-- - Okay, so magic, fine. - Fine. - That's a true story about Channing Tatum. Okay, do we have a more? - Do you have a new one? Do you have a new one? - I'll read you my review and you can guess 'cause this is what I just picked out, okay? How about that? - You write letterbox reviews? - No, but I actually, I told Ian the other day that I want to. - Okay. - Oh, okay. - Here's one. - It doesn't cost anything, you can just do it. - You can do it for free, okay? - Okay, awesome, thanks guys. Okay, so this is one that you guys are gonna be like, I, what? - Okay, right. What's going on? (laughing) - That's enough. - Shush. - That's enough. - Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. - This is a review you wrote. Did you write this like in your notes? - No, no, no, I screenshot it enough. Stop. - Oh, oh, you found letterbox reviews. - Okay, here we go. Try to guess this. - This isn't kind of a bit of a niche one, but this is a newer movie. - Okay, okay. - I'm just glad we're seeing kids go outside again instead of being glued to their iPad screens. - Okay, is this like? - This is four stars from Miko. - Stand by me. - This is a new movie. - New movie? - No one questioned why this kid is running the town drive of Tin Soup. Like, here comes Soup Boy, three stars by Jay. - What? Oh, shoot. I may not have seen this, have I seen this movie? - Yes. - I have. - Yes. - Oh, God. Uh, okay, kids getting outside. - Three and a half stars by Coffee. You can tell this is made by a former sketch comedian because it's almost entirely set up for one really good bit. - That's weapons. - Oh. - Yes. - Nice, okay. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - That was just one that I wanted that I wanted to do. - No, that's good, that's good. - Wait, can I read you guys one that Caroline, Caroline, who's our lovely PA wrote? - Caroline? - This is a review. - Wait, okay. - Okay, so Caroline, I PA wrote this review. - Yes, she gave this movie five stars, loved it. Being better than the men around you, rocking a bob and having a horse. Like, yeah. - Having a bob. - He better than the men around you. So, who has a bob? Who's on a horse with a bob? - Okay, okay. I'm trying to think of movies. It's not, it makes you think of like mirror mirror, like Princess Diaries. - Is this like a popular one? - She doesn't have a bob on a horse. - Is it a new movie or a bob on a horse? - No, I wouldn't say this is a new movie. - Okay. Oh, well, you know who has a bob on a horse? - Who? - Lord Farquad. - Shrek? - No, but that's funny. - Is this being better than all the men around you? I don't think Lord Farquad, remember when I had this haircut and you kept telling me that I had his haircut? - No, I said you had the haircut of a 13th century crusader. And then I did the berries and cream commercial. And I put a wig on and it looked exactly like my hair. (laughing) - I don't think I know. Okay. - I think a bob on a horse. - Wait, is it worth wearing heights? - No. - She does not have a, you're crazy. - He has more of a bob than you. - He gave it four and a half stars and says, I love in movies when men are stupidity and it's in girls save the day. - Wait, did Caroline also, okay, so she wrote a second review? - Caroline just, Caroline wrote all the reviews. - Caroline really needed to get her thoughts out. - Appeals to every little girl's dream and desires, duplicity, deception and being exceedingly better than their male peers and having a kill count. - Oh, shit. - She's a murderer. - Do you think, Caroline, do you think I've seen this movie? - You guys have all seen this movie? - We've all seen it. - We've all seen it. - We've all seen it. - Did we mention that today? - I don't know. - And she drives a horse, she's got a bob. - Shit, I feel like. - Okay, Ella gave it five stars and this is gonna give it away. The L in LGBT is for Alicia. - Oh, is this, is this? - Is this? - Yeah. - Oh, she has a, does she have a bob? - She does kind of have a bob. - Yeah. - That's really good. - I gotta review for this movie. - I demand a weasel spinoff. Yes, I understand he killed 27 children, but just look at the little guy. This is like, "Fifle goes West" or something? - All right. - Are you gonna answer? - What if I was right? He's like, "Yeah, you gotta write." All right, we're done. - Wait, okay. - All right, a weasel spinoff. Just sure he killed, okay. - This is creepy. - Okay. - He killed 27 children, but just look at the little guy. - The hell? I feel like maybe this isn't good. Give us another review. - Oh, no, give you another review. - Yeah, I was saying like 10 reviews before you guys were guessing them. - Yeah, it's okay, you didn't come on. - Yeah. Okay, this happened to a couple of my friends a few years ago. - Okay, people leave that on every single thing. - Okay, here's the one. Weasel and my beloved. - That's not gonna actually help us in any of our capacity. - Not gonna lie, getting choked to death by Margot Robbie seems fun. I feel like that can be multiple. Margot Robbie movies. - Wolf of Wall Street? Nope. - There was no children killed in that movie. Wuthering Heights? - This one said, "I don't care. "I'm just gonna say it, king shark is a himbo." - Oh, this is a suicide squad. - Yeah, nice, yeah. There was that weird weasel thing? - Yeah, you're right. - That's weird. - Forgot about that. - I just recently watched it for the first time. - Okay, I think you guys are gonna get this really, really good. - Okay. - Four and a half stars by Camilla. Ed Warren exercised this poo. - Wait, sorry. Can you repeat that? Can you repeat that? - Sure, sure, sure. - Ed Warren exercised this. Is it the exorcist? - Nope. - Oh, god. - Look me dead in the eyes and tell me James Wan isn't into puppets a little too much. Two and a half stars by Jay. - James Wan. Is that your director? - Yes. - Puppin' four and a half stars by Vy. Thought my house was haunted because the TV kept turning off. Turns out I was sitting on the remote. (laughing) - I'm sorry. - Is that a review of anything to do with the movie? - Thought my house was haunted because the TV kept shutting off. - Is that. - It's not even. - Does that play a part of the movie? - Annabelle, you're getting close. - Okay, conjuring. - Yes. - Oh, Annabelle is in it. - Annabelle's in it. Here's what I wanted to read to you because you are a sicko and do this. Five stars by Reese. One of the little girls slept without the blanket covering her feet and was shocked when the demon grabbed her question mark. You always sleep with your leg out. Dude, you're gonna get snatched. Shane, you're gonna get snatched. - I know, I believe that. - That's the conjuring. I think such a good horror movie. So dark. This game is fun. - I don't know, but I don't know if y'all have seen this, but it's a new movie, came out in 2025. - Probably haven't. - I said, my review is the major sure loves to talk about nut sacks. - What are you doing? - Sorry, when did you say this movie came out? - 2025. - 2025. - The major sure likes to talk about nut sacks. Is it the new Avatar movie? - No. - Oh, that's a good guess. I don't even have nut sacks, do they? - No, I'll give you no one. I think these ones are gonna be fun. - Is this same movie? - Yes. - Okay. - All right, I got it. Okay, so I'd be the guy. I'd be the guy, I don't know what it's maybe not. - I'd be the guy dying, sorry. (laughing) - I'd be the guy dying, cause you, sorry, fuck, what the fuck. - There's nothing that has made you laugh this hard. - Dude, I've never seen you like this. - I got you. - I'd be the guy dying, cause you has to shit. - That's what's making you laugh. - It's so hard, dude. - Wait, there's like Jurassic Park. - No. - I've never seen a guy, cause he has to shit. - Yeah, I remember. Well, he's on the toilet, cause he's tired. - He's scared, he's tired. - You're crazy. - Yeah, but he kind of does, cause he has to shit. - What's happening here? (laughing) - I don't know. Here's another review. Yeah, we so doomed, they kept calling each other brothers. - We've definitely not seen this movie. - I'd honestly sign up just to make a friend like Pete. - They're out of the band, the show, the movie. - This one should give it away. - Thought it was about walking, then came the poop. - Is this the long walk? - Yes. - I haven't seen the long walk, at all. - I've never even heard of it. - Oh, that makes sense that someone dies, cause they have to shit. - Yeah. - Well, you know what's funny? - Cause shitting is hard when you have to keep walking. - I know the premise of the movie is that they have to keep walking, and if you stop walking, you get killed. But like, marathon runners shit themselves and keep running all the time. - Why would they even want to watch this movie? - Well, it's a Stephen King book turned into a movie. - It's a movie. - It's really good. - It's really good. - But yeah, there's a couple of people where shitting is like, it's a problem. - I think it's funny that in the same year, two Stephen King books got turned into movies. The Running Man and the Long Walk. - Oh. - Is that really funny? - I heard that. - It was okay. I saw it. - Okay. it one day. Just at home. That's fine. - Oh Ian, did you notice? - Of a table. (bell dinging) (laughing) - You know it's funny, I, 'cause I know people are asking for a table. - Oh yeah, they were. - They were? - Oh yeah. - There's no way. I didn't even hear about that. - Yeah, I don't know, I don't check. - Did you? - No, I didn't know that. - Wait, I got one more from Caroline. - Okay, Caroline, I'm gonna close this out here. - Five stars, love it. Irish boy wants to be in the center of a dance circle. So bad, he makes it a whole thing. I had two slushies, half bag of popcorn and half bag of gummy worms, yum, yum, yum. - Titanic. - What? - Oh, that makes sense. - That makes sense. - Thank you. - He's not Irish, though. - Irish boy, no, it's not Irish. - But there were Irish people. - Oh yeah, remember the Irish man. - And the Irish boy was in the center of a dance circle. So bad. - Bellfast. - Is it, is it, I hate that I keep bringing up Emerald Fennel movies, but. - Saltburn? - Saltburn. I don't know. - Is it Saltburn? - How recent is this movie? - It's a new movie, it came out in 2025. - Oh, Irish boy wants, I may not have seen it. - I swear. - Are there other reviews for this movie? - Mac gave it four and a half stars. Standing ovulation, I mean, ovation. - Whoa. - Joe A gave it four and a half stars. - That one sequence, you'll know when you see it. Magnum Opus type scene, spirit awakening type scene, inspirational, foundational. - Centres? - Yes. - Oh. - Irish boy. - Oh. - Yep. - So what happened to two slushies? (laughing) - Damn. - That was just caramel. - You were doing work. (laughing) - My God, these things. - The contestant was like, are you gonna watch the movie? Jesus, you've been coming back here. - I'm back right out of slushie, hit me, man. - Come on. Hit me. - Centres is rocking me. - Can we talk about some of our lowest rated movies? - I wanna know what some of your lowest rated movies are. - Okay, so I got, I got, this one's an all-timer. Wonder Woman 1984. That movie's pretty rough. - I need the stone. - Wow, didn't invite. - Was that your review for it? - No, I didn't leave a review. Don't worry, darling. - Rarely has there been a gap so enormous between, how smart a movie thinks it is and how smart it actually is. - Whoa. - Very status performance. I, Carly, was much better in my opinion. - Oh, it is like the best way to describe that movie and I'm, this is not my original thought. This is somebody else's thought. Was like a white woman's attempt at making a Jordan Peel movie? - Oh, that is brilliant. - Like it felt like a student film that had like a $200 million budget. - Whoa. - Well, there was so much drama surrounding it because she apparently Olivia Wilde was dating Harry Styles during the shooting and that's where I was. - Yeah, I don't care about that. - Well, the Truman show but Harry Styles violently eats pussy. (laughing) - Oh, there was a, yeah, there was that scene. (laughing) - Listen, I think Harry Styles is cute. I don't ever want to see him do that. - No. - Sorry, I don't know what it is. I don't like it. I don't want that. - I've gotten up on your tiptoes. Have you guys ever seen tiptoes? - I am very aware of tiptoes. - Isn't that Gary old man? - Not Gary old man. - Yeah, it is. - Gary old man playing a little person. - It is a, they just have been shopping around on his knees and when he's sitting in a couch, they have, he has a little like puppet legs. - No, I saw. - And he's like, he's clearly like in the couch. And this is a serious movie. This is not a comedy. - It's Matthew McConaughey. It's Matthew McConaughey and Gary Oldman are brothers. - He's not world-owned. - I think they're twin brothers? I think they're maybe twins. I forget, they're brothers. So Matthew McConaughey. - So McCail make fun of this movie all the time on the super. - I don't know. His brother is supposed to be a little person but it's played by Gary Oldman on his knees. And it's like an Oscar-bait movie. - Yeah. - Like they were really trying. - Well Gary Oldman's a great actor. - Yeah, not, yeah. But speaking of another like total train wreck Oscar-bait movie, music, I don't even know if I've heard about this movie. - Wait, is that Sia's movie? - Yeah. Sia's movie where she like, - Okay, speaking of Dance Moms, which we weren't speaking of, but I'm thinking about Dance Moms for some reason, which I'll explain later. One of the lead in Dance Moms is the lead in music. And she plays someone, she just, it's not the right casting. - Sure, yeah. - Okay, but I do have a lot of review that I think you guys are gonna get. Four stars. Jeba? Tony Collette deserves a normal family. - Hereditary, six cents. - Six cents. - We nailed two different ones. Yeah, she, boy, she loves to play moms that are- - Six cents. - One of my favorite movies. - Six cents is incredible. - Of all time. - Yeah. - And then I told you that I didn't realize the little boy's name is Cole. And I've loved the name Cole Forever. That's my son's name. - Boy. - Should I ask him if he's dead people? - And he's just like, "Baw." (laughs) - He just, no, that's his thing now. He goes, "Huh?" "Huh?" "Huh?" "Huh?" - I think we're out of time. - I think we're out of time. - Okay. - Wow, Ian could be here all day. Look at him. - I can see, I can be here all day. - I love just talking about movies. - Me too, I can go on. - This is what we do most of the time. - Yes, we talk about movies, we talk about shows that we're watching. - Is that a problem? - No. - That's awesome. - We love our medium, it's fine, it's great. - We love our medium. They tell us about ghosts that they see. - Yeah, they're from Long Island. (laughs) - You guys are off. - No, we do really just love shows in movies. - Yes, I love you guys. - That's the first time you've ever said that. - Yeah, you probably will hear it again. - And that's the hardest I've ever seen you laugh, and it was about poop. - Shitting while walking. - Yeah. - Okay. - Nothing goes together like Stephen King and pooping. That is true. - That is so true. - That is true. Ian, thank you for joining us. - Thank you. You're gonna ask me like what my socials are. - No. - They can find me. - You can find Ian somewhere watching a movie. - That's probably true. That is actually true. You watch a movie every day, you said. - Oh wait, quick, what movies are you guys looking forward to? One movie, one movie, one movie. I still need to see Project Hail Mary, 'cause I love the book, bro. I love the book, and I just haven't gotten a chance to see it yet. - The Taste of Things, the French movie. - And I am excited, I'm excited for that Resident Evil movie. Could be good, the director of Weapon, be good. - I think. - It's good. - Me and Spencer and Ansel are gonna go if you wanna maybe come. You just can't sit next to us. - You guys already planned this? - Yeah, of course. All we do is text about Resident Evil. I'm actually not kidding. - You know what, you know I think could be a Banger movie. I'm just gonna call it sheep detectives. - What is that? - What is that up? Nope. - You know what I can't wait to see? The mummy, the new mummy. - What? The guy's name mummy? - No, the mummy. - 'Cause they have like the Lee, whatever's the new mummy. That mummy, with the girl? - Yep. - All right, comment down below what movies you're excited to see. - So judgmental. - Comment down below what movies you're excited to see what your favorite movie is. - Yeah. - What your least favorite movie is. Talk about movies down below. - Yeah. - And we'll see you next week. Bye. - Bye. - Bye.